


84 Years

by Chengyaaan



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: M/M, Titanic References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:28:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23926168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chengyaaan/pseuds/Chengyaaan
Summary: It's been eighty-four years since he had last held his hand.Eighty-four years since he made his promise to never let go.
Relationships: Cho Seungyeon | Seungyoun/Kim Wooseok | Wooshin
Comments: 10
Kudos: 51





	84 Years

**Author's Note:**

> Major credits to the director and writer of the Titanic. Majority of the dialogues and plot line came from the movie. I only added and change some things to include Seungseok.  
> Hope you enjoy.

Wooseok huffed as he glared out the carriage window. They were nearing their destination and it seemed that nothing would change his father's decision. 

Wooseok was born as the only child of a prestigious family, the proud son of Lee Dongwook, the owner of one of the most successful law firms in their state. 

He had been an exemplary child from a young age, always at the top of his class and excelling in all of his extracurricular endeavors. Everything that his parents asked from him, he had worked hard to achieve. He had followed everything they have told him to do, because he loved them and because he wanted to make them proud, but what they asked of him right now was too much.

"Quit sulking, Wooseok," his father told him. "Sakura is a lovely young lady, pleasing to the eyes and she comes from a very good family too." 

Wooseok watched the crowded streets as he tried to ignore his father's voice. 

"It would be good for our family to be related to the Miyawaki's. Having the governor as your father in law would help you gain more opportunities in life."

Wooseok rolled his eyes. He was an intelligent and strong willed young man. He could achieve anything he sought for without needing the help from other people. 

"Wooseok, what is it about her that you're so against?" his mother asked. 

Wooseok turned to look at his mother and father, frustrated at the question. In all honesty, he admits that there was nothing wrong with Sakura Miyawaki. That she was indeed a very beautiful and ambitious young lady, quite similar to him actually. He knew that it would be a dream come true for most men his age to have such a woman as their to be wife. 

But the one thing that hinders him from even considering the other as his partner… 

The reason as to why he was not interested in making her his…

Was because he was attracted to men. 

That's right. Wooseok had come to terms with his sexuality only recently, when he found himself paying more attention to the male actors in the pornography that his classmates had shared with him, instead of the women and their bouncy breast. 

Wooseok had only ever had time for his academics, he had never felt the need to form relationships with people. He had never expressed any interest on anyone, let alone someone from the opposite sex. 

But as he reflected upon his youth, Wooseok realised that he had always been drawn to his male teachers more than his female teachers. That he favored the masculine smell of woods and petrichor over the fruity perfumes of his female classmates. That he appreciated the broad shoulders and backs of the male athletes in his schools more than the curves from the female cheerleaders that all the other male students drooled over. 

He had rejected the feeling for a while after, finding it difficult to understand why he was different from the other guys from his class. He knew his parents would be extremely disappointed if he were to tell them and so he was fully committed to disregard his own feelings, keeping the secret with him to his death bed. 

But then his father talked about marrying him off with the governor's daughter, and he found himself struggling for air. Suffocating from the thought of being with someone he does not love, cannot love, for the rest of his life. 

Not only was it unfair for him, but it would also be unjust for Sakura to be married to someone like him. She seemed to be a nice girl who deserved a man that can love and cherish her. Besides, they barely knew each other. Her heart probably already belonged to another man. 

The carriage halted as they arrived by the docks. Wooseok stepped out and scowled as he looked at the giant ship that everyone has been talking about.

"I don't see what all the fuss is about," Wooseok remarked. "It doesn't look any bigger than the Mauretania."

His father clicked his tongue, shaking his head. 

"It's over a hundred feet longer than Mauretania and far more luxurious," his father commented, helping his wife out of the carriage. 

"Our son is far too difficult to impress," Dongwook said to his wife, making her chuckle as she looked at the ship herself. 

"So this is the ship they say is unsinkable?" Wooseok's mother asked. 

"It is unsinkable," his father insists. "God himself could not sink this ship!" 

They were then accompanied to the said ship, walking past all the lucky middle and lower class people excitedly waiting to board the Titanic. 

It was a ship of dreams to everyone else, but to Wooseok it was a slave ship, transporting him to America where Sakura insisted on having the wedding at. Inwardly, Wooseok thinks that she demanded to have it overseas in the hopes that it will deter him. It does, Wooseok would rather not spend days stuck in a ship just to marry someone he does not like and then to set sail back just to be forever fixed with that person for the rest of his life. 

But his father would not take no for an answer. Sakura's parents had already sent her there early in preparation for their wedding, and it would be downright disrespectful if he were to not show up when they have everything prepared for them. 

The floor beneath their feet shook as the boat took off. Wooseok could hear the people shouting their goodbyes even as they headed to their rooms.

Wooseok sighed as he made the room he would be sleeping in for at least a week a little like home. If he was being delivered to his unwanted bride then he might as well enjoy the journey. 

"Would you like to have them all unpacked, sir?"

Wooseok nodded as he helped take his collections of paintings out of their boxes. 

"Goodness Wooseok, you took those paintings with you?" His mother asked, looking at the array of paintings waiting to be hung in the room. "Why do you even collect them? They’re horrid."

"Because I find them fascinating, mother," Wooseok answered, gazing at the paintings. "It's like looking inside someone else's dream. Their meaning may seem to make no sense to us but is completely clear to the artist."

Wooseok had dreamt of being a painter when he was younger, wanting to be able to paint his feelings on blank canvases. 

But that was just not the life for him.

  
  
  
  
  
  


"She's the largest moving object ever made by the hand of man in all history."

Wooseok looked over the menu, uninterested as the other men in their table boast about the ship. Apparently the two men with their bushy moustaches and fancy suits were the one to design and lead the building of the vessel they were in. His father had forced him to join them for dinner, to show him how to interact with other high class men and their wives. Usually, Wooseok would silently follow his father's instructions but recently he had been feeling so smothered by his parents orders. He had joined them in the end, afraid of the angered tone his father used when he tried to say no.

"I can't believe your dear son is getting married," a lady across from them spoke to his mother. "My son must be around his age and yet he still has not shown interest in marrying." 

His mother gave a chuckle, giving the other woman a fake smile as they continued their conversation. 

Wooseok knew that his mother did not like the said woman. Her name was Kim Eunyoung, but everyone called her Cheetah. Her husband had struck gold someplace out West and she was what his mother called "newmoney." Wooseok does not find any reason to dislike the other woman. Her family had earned and worked hard for their wealth, which says something about their work ethic, and she seemed to be one of the few people in their class that does not discriminate based on the social statuses of those around her. 

But his mother detest the fact that she did not have upper class breeding since birth, a factor that makes her lesser than them in the eyes of his mother. 

"Is there anything you would like to have, my good sir?" one of the ship crew asked as she came around taking their orders. Wooseok exhaled as he looked through their menu once again. Nothing really interested him, and he became irritated again at how he was only wasting his time sitting there, listening to their idle chatter. 

"Your most expensive champagne, if you may," he requested, sending her a satisfied smile when he noticed the displeased look in his father's face. 

"It is far too early to be inebriated, Wooseok," his father tells him, fixing him a terse look. 

"He'll have the lamb, rare, with very little mint sauce," Dongwook reorders for him and Wooseok hid his clenched fist under the table. He reminds himself that his father was only doing what he thinks is best for Wooseok, but the constant decisions made for him always leaves him feeling powerless. 

"The boy should be able to drink when he wants to, don't you think so Dongwook?" Cheetah suddenly caught all of their attention. "How else could he become a man with his own voice if you continuously treat him like a child?" 

His father's nostrils flared as he took a deep breath to respond, only for Cheetah to speak again. 

"Hey, uh, who thought of the name "Titanic"?"

She turned to one of the other gentlemen at the table with a sweet smile. "Was it you, Bruce?"

They never go back to the topic again, thanks to the change of the conversation. Wooseok tried to cover his smile when he saw the woman giving his father a satisfied look. He sent a knowing nod towards her, in gratefulness for how she stood up for him. His father cleared his throat and Wooseok was once again aware of how tense the atmosphere by their table was after that, even when the food had arrived. 

He tried to enjoy his meal, but he had no appetite, and so when he ate a reasonable amount, he stood up and excused himself, thanking them for their company. 

Walking out to the top deck, Wooseok felt slightly relieved from escaping the closed off, smoggy room. The air was fresh, and Wooseok took a deep breath as he watched the birds above him fly freely. The deck below him was buzzing with life, full of the lower class people going about their time in the ship. 

Wooseok was as interested in them as he did with the upper class people in the room behind him, and so he just continued gazing at the horizon where the sky meets the sea when, suddenly, he felt like someone was watching him. 

Wooseok looked down to meet a pair of fox-like eyes, nothing special amidst the crowds of people around him. He quickly looked away, dismissing the little interaction and tried focusing on the view ahead of him. 

But a niggling voice at the back of his head was telling him to look back again, and he could not help himself from looking down to where he saw the man. 

Surprisingly, the fellow still had his eyes on him. The wind was ruffling his black hair softly as he slightly craned his neck to look back at Wooseok, his posture relaxed as he sat casually with his friends. 

Something in the way the other was looking at him so frankly made something inside Wooseok flutter. It was as though the commoner from below was looking straight to his soul, looking at who he was as a person. 

Wooseok wondered if he was able to, if the man was able to overlook his expensive suit and bejewelled outer self and see the real him, a pitiful and helpless man. 

"Wooseok, come inside," his father's voice suddenly talks to him from behind. "There's more people you should meet."

Wooseok sighed as he took one last deep breath before he had to go back inside the dreaded room, tearing his eyes away from the stranger from below. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok was sitting amongst another table full of snobby strangers, gloating about their riches, eating merrily without a care in the world, smoking their cigars in puffs of smoke. He had not said another word after he was told to introduce himself, and no one had approached him to chat, the faceless people asking his father about him instead, as though he could not talk for himself. It was at that moment that Wooseok saw his whole life as if he'd already lived it. An endless parade of parties and meetings, always the same narrow people, the same mindless chatter. Always having to follow his father's words, his actions controlled by him even after his old man's death. 

It felt like he was standing at a great precipice. With no one to pull him back. No one who cared or even noticed.

  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok walked back to his room at the end of the day, hating how the collar of his dress shirt kept digging into his skin. The area they were gathered was so stuffy and hot, Wooseok was sweating from underneath the layers of dress shirt and suit jacket that he had on. The taste of alcohol which he rebelliously drank made him want to throw up but his father had stopped him from leaving again and so he was trapped there the entire time. Even when he managed to get out, the smell of smoke still followed him as the scent lingered on his clothes. 

He wanted to rid himself of the smell, he wanted to take a shower and cleanse himself. His fingers fumbled on the buttons by his throat when he managed to get into his room, trying and seemingly failing to undo them. Wooseok huffed as he tried again, pulling the collar, hating how it felt like it was choking him. 

Goodness, can he not even do the simplest of tasks? 

The rational part of Wooseok's mind was telling him to just slow down, to look through the mirror if needed. He was a smart and capable young man. He shouldn't be throwing a tantrum for such a petty reason.

But then the drunk part of Wooseok's mind, the more darker, more cynical side, was just laughing at how useless and incompetent he was. 

Wooseok stopped and tried undoing the button of his collar again, only to snicker at himself when he couldn't.

Wooseok sighed, before bursting into laughter.

Wooseok closed his eyes as a burning feeling built up inside him, kept laughing until it turned into frustrating grunts as he pushed all the contents of his dresser table aside, glass amongst other things shattering on the floor. Wooseok picked up the chair beside the table and threw it against the wall, shouting out in anger as he threw everything within his grasp. Wooseok panted as he looked around his room. It was a mess and he was sure that his father would give him an earful when he found out. 

Wooseok rubbed his hands over his face, realising that he had tears in his eyes. He looked at the mirror to see not the handsome and confident young man that he had always seen himself as, but instead the broken and desperate boy that just wanted to be free.

He wants to be free. 

He doesn't want to be here anymore, he can not be there anymore. 

Not just in the room he was in, but in this reality as well. The reality where he was trapped under the social expectations of having to always be the perfect son, of marrying another high class woman, of living the life his father wants him to have.

He doesn't want that. He doesn't want any of that. 

Wooseok was so busy wallowing in his sorrow that he didn't realise that his feet were moving. It was only when the cold wind shook his body did it register in his mind that he was outside, shaking and crying. He wiped his tears with the cuffs of his suit, not caring about the other passengers he was pushing away as he ran past them.

Ran to where he did not know, he just knew that he had to go. 

Wooseok was a crying mess as he made it to the end of the ship. He sobbed as he looked over the horizon, the sun now replaced by the moon. Wooseok walked closer to it, longing to be there, away from here, anywhere but here. He was stopped short by the barrier, frustrated, he looked down and saw the dark abyss of the sea below. 

Wooseok had once accidentally dropped one of his mother's precious rings when they went cruising when he was younger. He remembered watching it slowly sink, down, down below until he could no longer see it. 

He knew his mother would be furious and so he lied that it just disappeared, out of sight. His mother was still very angry with him for the next couple of days, but his father bought her a new, more expensive one, a ring that costs over a million pounds and she no longer cared for the old ring anymore. 

Maybe Wooseok can disappear too. 

Wooseok blinked, tears falling down his face. He looked around to make sure no one else was around before he raised his foot onto one of the horizontal railing. 

His heart was racing as he stepped onto it with both feet and then took another step on the next railing.

His hands were shaking as he gripped the banister tightly so that he could raise his leg over the barrier, slowly placing his feet on the other side, and then the other.

He tried slowing his breathing as he lowered himself and turned to look down again at the water, looking more frightening now that nothing was stopping him from falling apart from his own hands. The waves were crashing against the ship and Wooseok closed his eyes as he tried to gulp the fear down his throat.

It is okay, he tells himself.

His parents are still young, they can have another child. Better yet, they can adopt another young fellow who can marry Sakura in his place. 

It's okay. They'll get over it. 

Everything will be okay. 

Wooseok leaned forward, arms taut in tension as he prepared to let go.

It'll be okay. This is for the best. This is-

"Don't do it."

Wooseok opened his eyes wide open as he turned his head to find another man around his age standing a few feet away from him.

"Stay back," he warned the other. He just wanted to get this over and done with, why did this idiot decide to interrupt?

"Don't come any closer."

Wooseok's sight was slightly blurry from his tears, but he could see how the man was looking at him with concern, eyebrows furrowed as he held his palm out like he was interacting with a wild animal. Then he tilted his hand so that he was holding out a helping hand instead. 

"Come on. Just give me your hand." 

Wooseok clenched his jaw as the man took small steps towards him, the cigarette between his mouth reminding him of the stuffy room he was in. 

"I'll pull you over."

"No! Stay where you are. I mean it, I'll let go, " he threatened. Wooseok turned his head back to the water and relaxed his hold onto the railing slightly. 

Wooseok waited for another moment before he looked back again. The man was still, not moving from where he was. His eyes were moving restlessly, as if he was trying to quickly think of something to stop Wooseok. 

When their eyes met, Wooseok recognised the young man as the chap he was looking at from earlier that day, the one who was staring at his soul. 

Wooseok apprehensively watched as the other slowly took the cigarette out of his mouth, using it to point at the sea, wordlessly reasoning that he was just moving closer to throw his cigarette away. He chucked it to the sea, and Wooseok realised then that he was now just an arm length away from him. 

"No, you won't," the man said calmly, making Wooseok huff in exasperation.

"What do you mean, no, I won't?" Wooseok asked back.

"Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do. You don't know me."

He looked at the young man's old and dirtied clothes, mentally laughing at how idiotic he seemed. Who was he to act as though he was smarter than him?

"Well, you would have done it already," the fellow said casually, hands in his pocket, as if he was just simply talking to anyone and not to a desperate young man ready to take his own life. 

Wooseok furrowed his brows as he gasped in annoyance. 

"You're distracting me. Go away."

"I can't. I'm involved now," the man answered him. Wooseok turned to see him shrugging his shoulders. 

"You let go and I'm going to have to jump in there after you."

Wooseok blinked. 

"Don't be absurd. You'll be killed."

"I'm a good swimmer," the young man said with a smile, talking off his worn out coat and undoing his shoe laces. 

"The fall alone would kill you," Wooseok tried to deter the other.

"It would hurt. I'm not saying it wouldn't."

The man took off his left shoe.

"To tell you the truth I'm a lot more concerned about that water being so cold."

Wooseok held his breath as he looked down to the angry looking sea. He gulped nervously before looking back at the man. He had managed to take his other shoe off.

"How cold?" Wooseok checked. 

The man looked at the water, pursing his lips in thought. 

"Hmm, freezing. Maybe a couple degrees over."

Wooseok's heart paused for a second just imagining how cold it would feel. 

"You ever, uh... ever been to Wisconsin?" The man asked out of nowhere, an eyebrow raised in question. 

Wooseok looked at him in disbelief. "What?"

"Well, they have some of the coldest winters around," the young fellow explained, eyes shining as he kept going.

"I grew up there near Chippewa Falls. I remember when I was a kid, me and my father, we went ice fishing out on Lake Wissota. Ice fishing is, you know, where you-"

"I know what ice fishing is!" Wooseok exclaimed angrily. 

The man raised both his hands up in peace.

"Sorry. You just seem like… you know, kind of an indoor type of man."

Wooseok shook his head as he looked back down the sea.

"Anyway, I, uh…" the fellow was now almost next to him, arms braced on the railings as he looked at Wooseok. 

"I fell through some thin ice and I'm telling you…" 

Wooseok gazed at the other's fox-like eyes, looking back at him so genuinely.

"...water that cold, like right down there..."

The man seemed lost in his own memory as he focused his eyes on the sea. 

"...It hits you like a thousand knives stabbing you all over your body…"

Wooseok tightened his grip on the railing as he looked down with him. 

"...You can't breathe…"

Wooseok held his breath. Heart racing in his chest.

"... You can't think- at least not about anything but the pain." 

Wooseok exhaled a shaky breath out, terrified of the crashing waves below them.

There was a moment of silence as the both of them just stared at the freezing water. 

"Which is why I'm not looking forward to jumping in there after you," the fellow finally broke the quietness of the night. 

"Like I said…" he took off his vest.

"I don't have a choice."

Wooseok looked the man up and down, wondering if he was seriously going to keep his words, even though he already knew the feeling of being submerged under such cold waters. 

"I guess I'm kind of hoping you'll come back over the rail and get me off the hook here," he said softly. 

Wooseok considered for a moment before shaking his head. 

"You're crazy," Wooseok muttered, turning away from the man. 

"That's what everybody says," the young fellow said and Wooseok could hear the smile in the other's voice. 

"But with all due respect, my good sir..."

Wooseok felt the warmth behind him as the other came closer to say softly to him. 

"I'm not the one hanging off the back of a ship here."

Wooseok paused as he mulled over the other's words. 

"Come on. Come on, give me your hand," the young man coaxed him gently. 

"You don't want to do this."

A hand with short fingers slowly reached out beside Wooseok. Wooseok looked at it for a moment, before slowly letting one of his own hands hold firmly onto it. 

Wooseok carefully turned his whole body to face the other man, finding himself looking up at the smile growing on the other's face. 

"Whew," the man blew out in relief, his smile turning his eyes into crescents. "I'm Cho Seungyoun."

For a moment, Wooseok found himself lost in the stars in the other's eyes.

"Kim Wooseok," he said back. 

"Nice to meet you, Wooseok," Seungyoun said as he flashed the smaller man a blinding smile. "Come on."

Wooseok gave a small smile back and carefully began climbing back to the other side of the barrier. Seungyoun used his other hand to hold onto Wooseok's arm, helping him as he took a step onto the first horizontal railing. 

It was going well, until the sole of his right shoe slipped and Wooseok lost his balance as he tipped back.

He screamed as he fell.

For a split second, he seriously thought he was going to die.

But then he realised that Seungyoun was gripping firmly on his right hand and arm as the taller man tried to pull him back aboard.

"I've got you," Seungyoun reassures him with a strained voice.

"Come on. Come on," he was grinding his teeth as he pulled the other up close to the railing, hoping that Wooseok could also grab onto it.

In his effort of pulling the smaller man up, Seungyoun let his hold on Wooseok's hand go to hold higher up his arm. But his grip was on the sleeves of Wooseok's suit and so the smaller man found himself slipping from the others hold as his arm slid out of the suit sleeve.

"Help!” he screams again.

“Please! Help! Please!" Wooseok kept repeating, voice going hoarse as he tried to hold onto Seungyoun's hand with his other arm.

The taller man tried to reach for his right arm again. Since the other still had his suit half on, it was more wise to hold onto the arm without the suit sleeve. Leaves less chance for their grip to loosen. 

"Please help me!" Wooseok pleads again.

"Listen. Listen to me. I've got you. I won't let go," Seungyoun shouts back at him. 

Wooseok looked at Seungyoun's eyes and despite being so closed to death he somehow felt peace and comfort.

"Now pull yourself up. Come on!"

They slowly worked together to pull Wooseok up. Seungyoun grunting in effort as he lifted the smaller man, planting his feet on the floor so that he too would not tip over. 

"Come on. That's right, you can do it," Seungyoun encourages Wooseok as the other manages to wrap his arms around the taller man's neck. 

"I've got you," Seungyoun adds as he grabbed onto Wooseok's pants to hoist him up, using the smaller man's pants pockets for more grip as he finally pulled him up over the barricade. 

Though Wooseok's heart was beating fast, he felt very safe in the arms of the other. But it would be a stretch if he said that he wasn't shocked into silence by what just happened. 

He was on his back with Seungyoun over him, the taller panting from all the effort it took to save Wooseok. 

"What's all this?"

Three ship crew men came running towards them. Seungyoun moved quickly off Wooseok as he looked back innocently at them.

The men took in the scene, looking at Wooseok on his back, tear stained face and pant pocket pulled out, to Seungyoun who was just hovering over him.

"You stand back! And don't move an inch!" the head of the group shouted at Seungyoun. He then turned back to one of the other men and ordered. 

"Fetch the master-at-arms!" 

  
  
  
  


Wooseok was wrapped in a warm blanket as his mother hovered over him full of questions.

"Was he trying to rob you? Did he threaten to kill you? Was he trying to steal your suit? Why was it half off-"

Wooseok was still in a state of shock, not having said one word yet after the incident. He couldn't believe he was so stupid to climb over the barrier and risk losing his life. His parents would send him to a mental hospital if they ever found out he was suicidal. He shouldn't have done such a stupid thing. Maybe that's why his father always makes the decision for him. Because apparently, he makes horrible choices when on his own. 

Wooseok's internal meltdown was cut short when he finally noticed the security of the ship wrapping Seungyoun's wrist in handcuffs. 

"This is completely unacceptable!" Wooseok's father exclaimed, standing face to face with Seungyoun. "How dare you try to steal from my son?"

Seungyoun cautiously regarded the older man before looking at Wooseok. 

"Look at me you filth!" Dongwook grabbed the younger's shirt in anger. 

"Father!" Wooseok called out.

"What do you think you were doing?" Dongwook continued, pushing Seungyoun as Wooseok stood up to stop him. 

"Father, stop. It was an accident," he tried to explain to his father. 

"An accident?" Dongwook asked incredulously. 

Everyone looked at Wooseok, unconvinced.

"It was. Stupid really," Wooseok tried to think of another excuse as to why they would be found in that position. 

"I was leaning over, and I slipped," Wooseok opened his mouth, looking briefly at Seungyoun, unsure of what to say next. 

"I was leaning far over to see the, uh... uh…"

Wooseok's mind decided to fail him at that moment. 

"Uh…" Wooseok closed his eyes, turning his fingers round and round, in the hopes that the word he was looking for would miraculously come up. 

"Propellers?" Seungyoun filled in for him. 

Wooseok nodded. "Yes, propellers and I slipped." 

He turned to look at Seungyoun who had a subtle smirk in his face. Wooseok turned back to his father, hoping that he wasn't blushing.

"And I would have gone overboard," Wooseok continued. 

"But Mr. Cho here saved me and almost went over himself," he finally managed to finish, looking back at Seungyoun who was biting his lips to stop himself from chuckling. 

"You wanted to see…" his father muttered looking at Wooseok's face carefully. 

Dongwook laughed in disbelief. "He wanted to see the propellers!"

"Was that the way of it?" The security behind Seungyoun asked the man in handcuffs. 

Seungyoun looked back at Wooseok, who was staring back at him with wide eyes, hoping that the taller would just follow his story. 

Seungyoun gulped before he nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, that was pretty much it," he agreed. 

"Well, the boy's a hero, then," one of the old higher class men that had come with his parents said. "Good for you, son. Well done."

Wooseok let out a sigh of relief as the man continued on complimenting Seungyoun. 

"So it's all's well and back to our brandy, eh?" The man turned to his father, who nodded in annoyance as Seungyoun was freed from the handcuffs. 

"Look at you," Wooseok's mother came over to wrap the blanket more tightly around him. "You must be freezing. Let's get you inside."

Wooseok was getting dragged with his parents when the old man stopped them for a moment. 

"Perhaps a little something for the boy?" He raised an eyebrow as he tilted his head towards Seungyoun. 

Dongwook looked unwilling but he spoke to his butler anyway. "Of course. Mr. Choi, I think a 20 should do it."

Wooseok laughed as he looked up to his father. 

"Is that the going rate for saving your only son?"

Dongwook narrowed his eyes as he watched Wooseok's reaction. 

"Hmm," he hummed before turning back to Seungyoun. 

"Perhaps you could join us for dinner tomorrow evening, young man, to regale our group with…" he paused as he looked at his fellow high class friend. "...your heroic tale?"

Wooseok was tense as he watched Seungyoun look cautiously at his father. His father never dines with those lower than him, much less invites one to their table. Saying that Wooseok was suspicious of his father's invitation would be an understatement and he does not want to put Seungyoun in trouble. 

"Sure, count me in," the other man replied and Wooseok's eyebrows rose as the other looked back at him with a smile. 

"Good. It's settled then," his father said, turning his back away from the young man. "This should be interesting," Dongwook said as he pulled Wooseok with him.

When they reached their quarters, Dongwook stopped and held Wooseok in place by his shoulder. 

"Wooseok, my boy."

Wooseok turned to look at his father. 

"I know you've been melancholy lately," his father admits. "I don't pretend to know why." 

Wooseok huffed as he rolled his eyes. He had made it clear how against he was of the wedding. When his father announced their engagement, Wooseok had barely spoken two sentences with his supposed fiance and yet their whole lives had already been planned out for them.

"Let me speak first," his father insisted, knowing that the young man was ready to argue back. 

"I intended to save this until the reception next week," Dongwook said, taking out a piece of paper. "But I thought better tonight…" 

He placed a piece of paper on Wooseok's hand, as well as a top hat that had their family emblem embroidered on it. Wooseok looked at his father, confused, until he read with wide eyes each and every line of the document. 

"You're giving me…" Wooseok began. 

"... The entire firm once you get married," Dongwook finished. 

"The company, along with all its branches will be under your name," his father said proudly. 

"You would be a married man soon, who would hopefully bear me and your mother grandchildren. You would have your own family and I think it is only right to pass on our legacy unto you."

Wooseok just felt the weight of the world over his shoulders. He turned back to see his father and mother looking at him with hopeful smiles. He felt tears forming on his own as he smiled guiltily back. His mother laughed, crying with him as she hugged her son. His father only continued smiling as he patted their son's back. 

From the outside, it looked like a very happy and domestic scene. But on the inside, Wooseok was screaming. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok woke up the next day, wondering if everything that had happened was just a dream. His room was back to normal, as though he did not make a mess of it the night before. The top hat and the piece of paper that will give him the right to his father's firm were no longer by his bedside table. 

Did last night really happen? 

Wooseok prepared himself before he walked out of his room, looking for his parents. They were not in their quarters and so he assumed that they were by the usual place they gather with the upper class men. Wooseok walked out to go there, and once outside he realised how warm he felt under the sun. He looked up to see the bright yellow planet hovering above all of them. Of course, he had always seen the sun during the day, but he had never remembered a time where he truly felt it's comforting warmth. 

A familiar voice caught Wooseok's attention as he looked down to the lower class deck. Wooseok squinted as he searched for a certain black haired man, wondering if he was real or just part of his crazy dream. 

Wooseok's attention was then fully focused on finding the said man, determined to meet him again to thank him properly.

He walked by the edge of the railing, looking carefully over all those below him. He managed to find the gate and stairs that allowed him to walk down to the third class deck. 

The atmosphere down there was so different from how it felt up the higher deck. The people were all mingled together, talking, smiling, singing to music as they enjoyed the lovely day out in the sun. 

His pristine and ironed white suit stood out amongst the drab and old garments they all wore, but it was very clear that despite that, they seemed far more happier than the higher class people he was usually surrounded with. 

At first they didn't notice him, but as he took tentative steps around, the chatter amongst them quieted until they all stopped. He knew that in reality, the room was still full of noises and life, it was just the rush of blood in his head dulling his hearing.

He did however hear a few whispers of "he’s so handsome" here and there, some looking at him fully up and down, but he chose to ignore them. His beauty had always garnered him much attention in the past, though his list of admirers throughout his school years were never his type unbeknownst to everyone.

Wooseok awkwardly smiled and nodded when he made eye contact with some of them. He felt slightly uncomfortable but he was resolved in finding the man that rescued him last night. 

He must be real, he tells himself every time he looks around only to not find him.

But then he saw the back of a familiar head of hair, and Wooseok gulped as he walked closer.

The fellow sitting beside the black haired man looked up at Wooseok with wide eyes, before tapping the man he had been looking for on the shoulders, pointing at Wooseok.

The fox-like eyes he had come to appreciate looked back at him in shock and bewilderment. The taller man blinked before standing up and walking closer to Wooseok. 

"Hello Mr Cho," he began, forgetting the reason why he had come there in the first place. 

"Hello, again," Seungyoun greeted as the sound of life came back to Wooseok's senses.

The sun shined at the taller man's hair, highlighting it to a dark brown. 

"May I speak with you?" Wooseok asked.

The other smiled as his eyes crinkled on the sides. "Yeah, sure." 

They remained standing there, Seungyoun's friends, or Wooseok guessed them to be the taller's friends, looked at him expectantly. 

Wooseok glanced at Seungyoun and then to the people beside them and then back to Seungyoun again. 

"In private?" He requested and Seungyoun looked taken aback for a moment before nodding and taking his sketchpad and charcoals with him. 

They walked back up the stairs, Seungyoun looking wary as one the crew man eyed his clearly lower class attire. 

"It's okay, you're with me," Wooseok reassured him, glaring at the crew man. 

"As long as I don't get in trouble because of you again," Seungyoun joked. 

Wooseok laughed, raising his hand to cover his mouth. "Oh, I'm so terribly sorry about that," he apologised. 

"My parents are just very protective, I'm an only child and so when those crewmen reported to them, I guess they just thought of the worse."

Seungyoun nodded in understanding, looking unbothered by it. 

"Being protective is good," Seungyoun agreed. "But being overly so…" he insinuates.

Wooseok knew what the other meant and also somewhat agreed that his parents are a tad over protective. But Wooseok's pride in his parents was challenged. His savior or not, this man beside him did not have the right to question their parenting. Wooseok was sure that his parents were far better than the ones the man beside him has.

He truly was not looking for a fight but he could not help react how he usually does: with his sharp tongue. 

"Better to overprotect your children than to not care for them at all," he attacked. 

Seungyoun's eyes narrowed as he turned his head to look ahead of them. Wooseok thought he saw hurt in the other’s eyes but couldn’t confirm since the taller seemed determined not to look back at him ever again. 

Wooseok's heart sank when he realised that he had been rude to the man that had helped him, and so Wooseok decided to change the subject. 

"So you said that you came from the States? How come you were in England?" Wooseok asked. 

Seungyoun had been walking beside him quietly, in deep thought as he kept his expression neutral. Wooseok wondered if he would answer him, or if he'd ruined… whatever this was. 

"Ah, yes well," Seungyoun said finally, eyes still set forward. 

"You know how hard life gets for the poor," the taller man began. 

"Especially when your father dies," he added. 

Wooseok's mind paused as he took in what the other had just said. Horrified at what he had implied with his last jab from before. 

"It was only me and my mother. She was injured from the accident with my father, so I had to start working early for us. It was difficult though, no one would give a scrawny fifteen year old a job and so when a good and kind hearted irish man offered me one, even if it was to a faraway country, of course I accepted."

Wooseok opened his mouth to apologise only to be at a loss for words. 

"And well, after that I’ve just been hopping onto ships to go to where I can. It’s not too bad actually, I get to meet many interesting people like yourself, see the world, and also send money back to my mother," Seungyoun said, putting his hands in his pockets.

Wooseok, there, was then reminded of the stark difference between him and Seungyoun. Now, not just in their attire, but also in their upbringing. 

"Well, Wooseok…" Wooseok glanced back up to find the other finally looking back at him. 

"We've walked about a mile around this boat deck and chewed over how great the weather's been and how I grew up," Seungyoun listed the things they have done respectfully. 

"But I reckon that's not why you came to talk to me, is it?"

"Mr Cho, I-" 

"Seungyoun," the taller insisted on being addressed as.

Wooseok pouted, making the taller smile a little. Wooseok liked seeing the smile so he went along with the other’s wish.

“Seungyoun…” he began. “I just wanted to thank you for what you did. Not just for... for pulling me back but for your discretion too.” Wooseok hoped that the taller man could hear the sincerity in his words.

Seungyoun nodded nonchalantly. “You’re welcome.”

Wooseok stopped walking as he watched the other continue until he realised that Wooseok wasn’t beside him anymore. Wooseok didn’t like how unaffected the other looked with his gratefulness. The taller man probably didn’t understand how he had truly helped Wooseok in his lowest time. Wooseok huffed in humourless laughter as he walked closer to the other man.

“Look, I know what you must be thinking. Poor little rich boy,” Wooseok mocked himself. “What does he know about misery?” 

Wooseok clenched his fist as he realised how stupid he had probably looked to the other yesterday, talking about jumping off the ship because of all the responsibilites in his life, when there are people who were far less fortunate than him.

“No, that’s not what I was thinking,” Seungyoun surprised him by saying so with a serene expression. 

“What I was thinking, or what I was more worried about was…” Seungyoun said carefully. “...of what could have possibly happened to this young man to make him think he had no way out?”

Wooseok could feel his eyes moisten as he heard the genuine care from Seungyoun’s voice. He chanced a glance at the taller to find him looking at him patiently. His dark eyes letting him know wordlessly that he was free to tell him all his worries without the fear of being judged.

“Well, I-” Wooseok hesitated, wondering if he should indulge the other. Wooseok had never really shared his feelings to anyone. They were taught in school that it was only during times with a psychiatrist that one would talk about one's feelings. That it means there's something wrong with you if you needed to speak about them. 

But the other was looking at him expectantly and so Wooseok thought maybe letting off some of his frustration might help. 

"It was…" Wooseok thought of last night. What had triggered him? Was it because of the alcohol? The boring company he was surrounded with? His impending wedding? When he added all of those things in his mind, he finally realised...

"It was everything," he said.

"It was my whole world and all the people in it… The inertia of my life plunging ahead, and me..." Wooseok pointed at himself. 

"...powerless to stop it."

Seungyoun kept watching, listening as the smaller man continued pouring out his heart.

"I have no control whatsoever over my life. The things I do, my hobbies, the course I'm taking, I didn't choose to do them. The people I meet, the people I talk to, the crowds I'm always surrounded with, I have no interest in them and they have no interest in me. My entire childhood and teenage years were spent pleasing my parents. And now they want to take my future too by making me marry a woman that I do not even love."

Wooseok was breathing hard by the time he finished his rant. He wasn't sure why he told all of those things to Seungyoun but he felt much better already.

"Is this woman not nice?" Seungyoun asked.

Wooseok groaned as he shook his head. "No, she is nice. Or at least, she seemed nice from the few times I've met her."

Seungyoun hummed in thought as he pursed his lips. 

"Do you already have someone you love?" He asked instead. 

Wooseok frowned as he shook his head again. 

"Then what's stopping you from trying to love her?" The taller man asked. "If you're so powerless as you say you are, then nothing would stop this marriage from happening, and that's not your fault," Seungyoun frankly said.

"And I'm sure if you spend more time with this woman, then you would soon recognise the goodness in her heart. I know your relationship might not start with instant attraction like what you seem to want, but you can still build a strong and solid connection with her if you try hard enough."

Wooseok was nibbling on his bottom lip as Seungyoun offered his advice. Wooseok acknowledged that, in normal circumstances, the taller man's suggestion would be helpful. But having a relationship that can produce offspring is hard to achieve if you do not desire the person you are meant to be with. 

"It's because I…" Wooseok gulped as he stopped himself. He isn't sure if he should share this part of his reasoning to Seungyoun. If the other runs his mouth and word somehow reaches his parents, then he would be ruined for sure. But a part of Wooseok’s mind reminds him that Seungyoun had already had the chance to sell him out last night, and yet he didn't. 

Wooseok looked around to make sure no one else was nearby, that no one else would hear his next sentence. 

"It is because I am attracted to men."

Wooseok quickly lowered his gaze, examining his shoes. He did not want to see Seungyoun's reaction, didn't want to see the repulsion on the taller man's kind face. Wooseok didn't want to hear the disgust in the other’s soft voice. He honestly didn't want to drive away the only person in his life that seemed to have wanted to listen to him. A few silent moments passed by before the other man spoke.

"Hmm, that does make it more complicated," Seungyoun hummed as he held his chin with his hand.

Wooseok quickly turned his head to look over the other's expression. There was no judgment or aversion in Seungyoun's features. The taller only seemed deep in thought as he mulled over Wooseok's words. 

"You're not disgusted?" Wooseok wondered, surprised at how calmly the other reacted to his coming out.

Seungyoun smiled kind heartedly, leaning close to his ears, making Wooseok's pulse jump. 

"I've dabbled my feet a bit on those waters too," Seungyoun admittedly whispered.

Wooseok was shocked as the other moved back. 

"You… you're also…"

Seungyoun chuckled softly as he moved his head around, kind of like a nod, kind of like a shake. 

"Yeah… and no. I don't know really," Seungyoun confessed. 

"I mostly find myself with women, but there's been some men in my past that I found charming and well…" Seungyoun looked directly in the smaller man's eyes. 

"There's nothing wrong with a man loving another man, Wooseok. Afterall, we're all just humans."

Seungyoun's words echoed in Wooseok's mind. The very notion was so foreign to him. The concept that homosexuality was acceptable was so against everything that Wooseok grew up with. And yet, he felt so relieved hearing it.

"I'm guessing you haven't told your parents yet?" Seungyoun assumed. 

Wooseok shook his head silently.

"You should," Seungyoun urged him. "It would help in explaining to them why you do not want to marry this woman."

Wooseok dismissed the other's suggestion with a laugh. 

"No way. Never," he shook his head. "I'd be disowned if they ever find out." 

There was silence for a bit before Seungyoun clicked his tongue.

"I think I know why you have no control over your life," the taller said. 

Wooseok furrowed his brows as he tilted his head in question. "Why?"

"It is because you are a coward,” Seungyoun said simply.

Wooseok's jaw dropped as he took a step back from the other. 

"Excuse me," he huffed in defiance. 

"You're afraid of what your parents will do if they ever find out-" Seungyoun continued stating.

"They have given me everything I have in my life, what sort of shame and dishonor will I dare bestow unto them if I ever reveal the truth?" Wooseok challenged. 

"We both know how sorry of an excuse that sounds, Wooseok," Seungyoun countered with a knowing look. 

Wooseok had had enough. This man may have saved his life but that did not give him the right to insult him. Wooseok faked a laugh as he shook his head.

"This is absurd. You don't know me, and I don't know you and this is the end of our conversation," Wooseok announced. 

"If I'm a coward, then you are rude and uncouth and presumptuous and I am leaving now," his sharp tongue lashed out against Wooseok's permission. 

"Seungyoun,” he took the taller man’s hand and shook it firmly.

“Mr Cho, it's been a pleasure. I sought you out to thank you and now I have…"

“And you have also insulted me,” Seungyoun added with a smirk on his face.

“Well. you deserved it,” Wooseok reasoned.

“Right,” Seungyoun nodded his head, the slight quirk in the corner of his mouth still present.

“Right,” Wooseok repeated, still shaking the other’s warm hand. 

“I thought you were leaving,” Seungyoun reminded him, the smile now more evident on his face.

“I am,” Wooseok laughed again in disbelief, shaking his head as he dropped Seungyoun’s hand and turned to walk away. But he could not seem to leave him without giving another jab. He reasons with himself that he just could not dare let the other man have the last laugh between the two of them.

“You are so annoying,” Wooseok blurted, holding his head high before turning back again to finally leave. 

But his little outburst only served to entertain the other man as Seungyoun tilted his head with a chuckle. 

Wooseok stopped, annoyed at how the other seemed to be winning their little mind games even though Wooseok knew that he was far more smarter than the taller man.

“Wait, I don’t have to leave,” Wooseok said in realisation. 

“This is my part of the ship. You leave,” he ordered, pointing to the gate that leads to the third class deck.

“Oh-ho-ho,” Seungyoun laughed, adjusting his sketchpad to his right hand as he casually leaned on the ship's railing with his left. “Well, well, well. Now who’s being rude?”

Wooseok’s pride was once again hurt as he became aware of how hypocritical he was, the oher’s laid back posture showing that the other knew that he was indeed winning. Wooseok grasped on straws as he tried to one up the other.

“What is this stupid thing you’re carrying around anyway?” he asked, taking the sketchpad out of Seungyound’s hand. 

“I thought you were a labour man. So what are you, an artist or something?” Wooseok asked offhandedly, taking a seat by the bench near them, looking through the pad.

Wooseok eyes roamed over its contents.

“Well, these are rather good,” he commented, looking at the realistic portraits in the paper. It was detailed and precise, and even though the subjects of the drawings were just of common people, the drawings were filled with soul and life.

“They’re uh- they’re very good.” 

They were amazing actually. Sketches of a mother looking down to her child as she held him in her arms, of an old man with his wrinkled face. Of delicate fingers entwined together in firm grasp.

Seungyoun joined him on the bench as Wooseok marveled over his sketches. 

“Seungyoun, this is exquisite work,” Wooseok praised, looking over to the other.

Seungyoun had a bittersweet smile on his face as his eyes looked over his own art.

“They didn’t think too much of them in old Paree.”

“Paris?” Wooseok gasped in surprise. “Oh my, you do get around for a poor- well, uh...” Wooseok caught himself.

“Uh…” 

Seungyoung nodded his head with a smirk as if challenging the smaller man to continue what he was originally intending to say. 

“-a person of limited means,” Wooseok covered up. 

Seungyoun chuckled, looking unbothered. “Go on, a poor guy, you can say it.”

Wooseok chose to go through the others drawings instead, finding a serene looking woman in nude lying on her back as the next sketch. 

Seungyoun fidgeted slightly beside him, running his hand through his hair once as he waited for Wooseok’s reaction. 

“Well, well, well,” Wooseok said softly, turning the page to find another woman standing behind a mirror, the curves of her naked body visible from both sides. “And these were drawn from life?” he inquired.

Passersby walked by, and Wooseok hid the drawings discreetly as to not show to others. Seungyoun gave him a teasing smile, when the other opened the book once again to look at his drawings.

“Well, that’s one of the good things about Paris- lots of girls willing to take their clothes off.”

Wooseok chuckled with Seungyoun as he turned the pages for more art.

It was the same woman as the first drawing he saw, again she was nude but the sketch focused on her upper body, one hand playing with her hair, the other resting on her stomach just under her bosoms. The next page was a closer view of her face, eyes closed as her head rested over her arms.

“You liked this woman,” Wooseok observed. “You used her several times.”

He waited for the other’s confirmation.

“Well,” Seungyoun stopped his flipping to show him another sketch of a pair of hands, delicate and small. “She had beautiful hands, you see?”

Wooseok smiled as he thought of how it was his turn to tease the other.

“I think you must have had a love affair with her,” he said, raising one of his brows in implication.

“No, no, no, no, no,” Seungyoun shook his head in denial. “Just with her hands.”

“She was a one-legged prostitute,” he informed Wooseok, showing another page that allows him to see her whole body. “See?”

“Oh!” Wooseok gasped in aghast.

Seungyoun laughed at his abhorred face, eyes shining as Wooseok’s soft voice joined him.

“Ah, she had a good sense of humor, though,” Seungyoun added. Wooseok watched the other look at the woman on the drawing fondly. 

“Oh, and this lady-” Seungyoun looked for another page that featured a fat old lady. It took a lot for Wooseok to take his eyes of the Seungyoun’s animated face, realising that the other was very excited to share his art with another person.

“She used to sit at this bar every night wearing every piece of jewelry she owned just waiting for her long-lost love.” 

The lady was indeed adorned in necklaces and rings, a worried but hopeful look in her face.

“Called her Madame Bijou. See how her clothes are all moth-eaten?”

Wooseok nodded as he took in all the details of the portrait. He turned the page to see the back of a lanky but lean man, broad shoulders in plain sight. Wooseok shifted in his place as he flipped through the pages to find multiple portraits of naked men drawn in a similar manner as the women before.

He was internally embarrassed at how more affected he was by just the drawings alone. 

Wooseok glanced shyly at the other, who was still looking at the pages, before turning his attention back on the drawings.

He hoped he wasn’t blushing.

“Well, you have a gift, Seungyoun. You do,” Wooseok sincerely praised the other. “You see people.”

Wooseok scanned through the portrait appreciatively before he faced the other only to find Seungyoun examining his face. 

“I see you,” Seungyoun said, taking Wooseok back to the day before where he saw the other looking at him from the deck below.

“And?” Wooseok asked, wondering what the other could see. He sat up straighter, squared up his shoulders with pride. He had always been confident with his looks.

“You wouldn’t have jumped,” Seungyoun suddenly said, and the confident smile on Wooseok’s face dropped.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok chose to forget about their little dispute from before as he walked with Seungyoun around the ship. Seungyoun had shown him more of his sketches and Wooseok eagerly listened about the many different people the taller had seen and met from around the world. Wooseok found himself enjoying the other’s company and was the one who suggested taking a walk to the other side of the ship when they managed to go through the whole sketchpad. Wooseok knew that he would need to go back to his parents and their charades when the taller man leaves him.

“Well, I didn’t care much for all that dadaism and cubism,” Seungyoun said as they discussed about art in general. “It just had no heart to it.”

Wooseok giggled as he thought about how Seungyoun sounded exactly like the philosophic artist that he was. 

“I like some of it,” he offers his opinion.

Seungyoun looked unimpressed as he looked at the shorter man. “Really?”

“Yes!” he answered truthfully, laughing as Seungyoun pouted like a baby because of how Wooseok disagreed with him.

“Well,” Seungyoun continued anyway. “Paris for me was…” Seungyoun was using his hands as he tried to gesture what he was trying to say.

“It was more about living on the streets and trying to put it on the paper, you know what I mean?” Wooseok could tell how passionate the other felt about the issue. He could see the fire in Seungyoun’s eyes and it also ignited the forgotten part of him that also loved art.

Wooseok nodded whole heartedly.

"You know I had a dream when I was a kid, where I ran away and became a painter," Wooseok shared. "I was living in a garret, poor but free," Wooseok said, smiling fondly at the silly dream. 

"You wouldn't last two days," Seungyoun interjects. "There's no hot water and hardly ever any caviar."

Wooseok wrinkled his nose.

"I happen to hate caviar," Wooseok quickly remarked. "And I hate people telling me what dreams I should and shouldn't have." 

Again his sharp tongue got the better of him. He was going to apologise when the other bet him to it. 

"I'm sorry," Seungyoun said sincerely. "You're right."

Wooseok watched as the other waited for his response. He enjoyed how Seungyoun respected his opinions and found it easy to forgive him. 

"That's okay, you can make me feel better by telling me more of your adventures in other lands," Wooseok suggested enthusiastically, stopping by to look at the sun at the horizon, the other gazing along with him. 

"Well, I mostly worked on construction because it doesn't require education and they always need an extra pair of hands. But when I moved to Ireland, I met this fellow who was fantastic with the fiddle. He was kind enough to teach me how to play and so I was able to play a few tunes on it. Then when I traveled to Italy, I happened to share a room with a musician, he made songs with the guitar," Seungyoun was explaining his tale so animatedly that Wooseok had a smile on his face the entire time. 

"And let me tell you, even though a guitar looks like a fiddle, they work quite differently." Wooseok didn't have the heart to tell him that that was obvious.

"I ended up learning how to play the guitar as well and he also inspired me to write lyrics."

"Oh, now you're telling me that you're a musician, Mr Cho?" Wooseok teased, making the taller laugh. 

"I'm a fantastic singer too," Seungyoun added, winking at the other.

Wooseok quickly looked away, not wanting to give the other the satisfaction of getting a reaction from him. 

Seungyoun just laughed again as he continued his story. 

"After Italy, was France. That's where I first got my hands on paper and charcoal. That was also when I started doing portraits by the Tower for fourteen cents apiece."

Wooseok pondered upon Seungyoun's stories, upon the many different experiences he had faced. Seungyoun and he were born of the same year, and yet it felt like the other had lived so many more lives than him. 

"Why can't I be like you, Seungyoun?" Wooseok asked sadly. "-just head out for the horizon whenever I feel like it?"

Wooseok knew it would never happen, but he nudged the taller man anyway.

"Say we'll go there sometime, to the Tower, even if we only ever just talk about it."

Something inside Wooseok fluttered as the other smiled softly back, playing along with his imagination.

"No, we'll do it," Seungyoun said confidently. 

"We'll drink cheap beer. We'll ride on the Grande Roue de Paris." Wooseok chuckled as he closed his eyes, envisioning the magnificent view from the top of the Ferris wheel, feeling the warmth of the person beside him just as he was feeling right then. 

"And we'll ride horses on the beach right in the surf. But you'll have to do it like a real cowboy. With the hat and shoes and everything."

Wooseok laughed as he opened his eyes to see the corners of Seungyoun’s eyes crinkling. 

"Will you teach me?" He asked innocently.

"Sure… if you like," Seungyoun agreed.

"I'll also teach you how to chew tobacco like a man."

Wooseok shook his head as he rolled his eyes. 

"Next thing you'll say that you'd teach me how to spit like a man," he joked. 

"They didn't teach you that in school?" Seungyoun asked in mock surprise. 

Wooseok's stomach was hurting from laughing so much. "Of course not!" 

Seungyoun paused as he considered for a moment before walking to the edge of the ship, closer to the water.

"Well, come on, I'll show you," he said, taking hold of Wooseok's hand when the shorter man didn't move. 

"Seungyoun, no," Wooseok whispered quietly, as he looked around to make sure no one could see their linked hands.

"Let's do it. I'll show you how," the taller insisted as he pulled the other with him. 

"Seungyoun, no!" Wooseok whispered again, more aggressively, but the other would not back down.

"Come on!"

"Wait, Seungyoun. No, I couldn't possibly," Wooseok said anxiously, fidgeting on his spot as he looked around them again.

"Watch closely," the taller man instructed as he gathered saliva in his mouth, pursing his lips in preparation. Wooseok was horrified when Seungyoun arched his neck backwards before snapping forward and spitting out a glob towards the ocean with great trajectory. 

"That's disgusting," Wooseok said honestly, but he found the corners of his lips lifting. 

"All right, your turn," Seungyoun told him, a cheeky smile also on his face.

Wooseok huffed. Spitting out like that was so against how a nobleman should act. But Seungyoun was looking at him so expectantly, and so he formed a small ball of spit and blew it out just by the side of the ship, wary of the passersby near them. 

"That was pitiful!" Seungyoun groaned out, triggering Wooseok's pride yet again, making him forget about the people around them. 

"Come on, you really got to hawk it back, you know?"

Wooseok nodded as he cleared his throat to gather mucus in his mouth.

"Get some leverage to it," Seungyoun explained. "Use your arms, arc your neck."

Seungyoun hawked and spat forward again. "See the range on that thing?"

Wooseok hummed in response, hawking again for good measure. 

"Okay, go!" Seungyoun said excitedly, pointing out to the sea. 

Wooseok arched his neck and spit out as hard as he could, the glob reaching a reasonable distance away from them. 

"That was better," Seungyoun said proudly, and Wooseok preened on the praise. 

"But you got to work on it more," the taller added. 

"Really?" Wooseok wondered how he could have done it any better than how he already had previously.

Seungyoun nodded. "Really try and hawk it up and get some body to it, you know? You got to…" Seungyoun began hawking loudly as Wooseok came to realise that his mother and her friends were standing behind them, horrified expressions clear on their faces. 

Wooseok nudged the taller man's arm in an attempt to stop him but it took a second too late as Seungyoun turned innocently to the group of ladies with spit dripping down the side of his lips. 

Seungyoun visibly swallowed what was in his mouth as he realised that they had company, and Wooseok felt second hand embarrassment as he tried to deal with his mother. 

"Mother," he called out to her sweetly. "I'm sure you remember Mr Cho."

"Ah, yes," his mother said curtly.

Cheetah, who was amongst the group of friends walking with his mother, discreetly signaled Seungyoun to wipe his chin and Wooseok gratefully smiled at her.

Wooseok charmingly told their group of how Seungyoun had rescued him. The others were gracious and curious about the man who had saved Wooseok's life but his mother looked at him like an insect-- a dirty little insect that must be squashed quickly.

"Well, Seungyoun, sounds like you're a good man to have around in a sticky spot," Cheetah praised the taller man. 

At that moment, the fanfare by the trumpets were played, signaling the time as close to dinner. 

"Why do they always insist on announcing dinner like a damn cavalry charge?" Cheetah asked good naturedly, making Seungyoun and Wooseok laugh in humor. 

His mother's face remained stoic, though, and Wooseok knew it was time for them to leave. 

"Shall we get ready for dinner, Mother?" Wooseok asked, taking his mother's arm, gently pulling her away. 

"See you at dinner, Seungyoun!" he waved to the other, smiling widely as Seungyoun returned it with his own.

  
  
  
  
  
  


His mother had suspiciously not mentioned a single thing about Seungyoun when they returned to their quarters. Wooseok was waiting for her to lecture him about mingling with the lower class but no such thing came from her mouth.

To say that he was excited to meet Seungyoun again would be an understatement to Wooseok, but he also felt cautious as he still did not know why his father had invited him to their dinner in the first place.

Wooseok chewed on his lips as he changed into a different suit, wondering what Seungyoun would wear for the dinner. He knew that the other would probably not have a freshly pressed suit just lying around in his room and so he worried for the new friend he had made. He should have organised earlier on the day to lend the taller one of his suits. But then the difference in their height and build would probably render his effort useless anyways.

Wooseok was still deep in his troubles as he followed his parents down to the dining hall, but then an image that surprised him became present before his eyes. 

Seungyoun stood by the bottom of the staircase, wearing a black suit and pants that emphasize just how long his legs were. His black hair was slicked back and he was standing so straight and proper, that made it impossible to think that the gentlemen before him then was the same poor man he was talking to merely an hour ago. 

Wooseok also realised that the other was not just standing but also had his hand out in the open air, shaking an invisible hand. Wooseok chuckled to himself as he found Seungyoun's personality still shining through even with all the noble facade that he was wearing. 

Seungyoun must have felt his eyes on him, as the taller man turned to watch Wooseok walking down the stairs. Wooseok would be lying if he didn’t feel charmed by how the other gazed at him as though they were the only two people in the world. He stopped just by the last steps of the stairs, so that the two of them met eye to eye and Seungyoun held out his hand just as he was practicing before. 

“Long time no see,” Seungyoun whispered.

Wooseok cracked a smile as they shook hands and the way the other’s face brightened with a bigger smile made his heart stutter for a second. Wooseok was hoping that he wasn’t blushing too harshly yet again as he walked with Seungyoun to his parents. 

“Father?” he called for the older’s attention. “Surely you remember Mr Cho.”

Dongwook turned to look past Seungyoun before he finally realised that the well put man before him was the same poor man that they had met the night before.

“Cho?” Wooseok’s father marveled. “Well, it’s amazing. You could almost pass for a gentleman.”

Wooseok frowned as his parent’s backhandedly insulted the man beside him.

“Almost,” Seungyoun repeated, looking unaffected by Dongwook’s subtle mocking.

They continued walking along with other high class people. Wooseok kept close to the taller man, hoping he wouldn't feel too out of place. Even though he hated situations like this, Wooseok felt better having the taller man with him. Not being alone made it easier to tolerate all those faceless people.

The two of them paused by the corner of the hall, Wooseok leaned closer to advise the other of who were attending the dinner with them.

“There’s the Countess of Rothes,” he said as he looked at one of the fine looking ladies in white and feathered hat. 

“And, um,” he looks around more, trying to find people he recognised. “That’s John Jacob Astor- the richest man on the ship.” Wooseok nods towards an old man who had a young woman holding onto his arm. “His little wifey there, Madeleine, is our age and in delicate condition,” he hints.

“See how she’s trying to hide it? Quite the scandal.”

Seungyoun chuckled as he nodded his head in agreement.

Wooseok points out a few other people, waving respectfully to those who happened to greet him. 

Cheetah then approached them, smiling kindly to Wooseok and looking proudly at Seungyoun like a mother. 

“Care to escort a lady to dinner?” she asked.

Seungyoun smiled like a perfect gentleman and offered his arm for the older woman. “Certainly.”

Wooseok looked between the two, not knowing that they were familiar with each other.

“Good ol’ Cheetah here was the one who fixed me up with this suit,” Seungyoun informed him.

Cheetah laughed as she also waved to other people around them. 

“Hey, Astor!” she called out to one of his father’s old friends. 

“Well, hello, Cheetah. Nice to see you.”

Wooseok and Seungyoun stopped with the older woman and Wooseok cleared his throat as he introduced his new friend to the couple. 

“J.J, Madeleine, I’d like you to meet Cho Seungyoun.”

“How do you do?” Madeleine asked. 

“Pleasure,” Seungyoun replied back with a polite smile. 

“Hello, Seungyoun,” Astor greeted, scanning the younger man. “Are you of the Boston Cho's?” he inquired.

“No- uh,” Seungyoun seemed unsure of the question, but it was only for a second before he flashed a confident smile. “The Chippewa Falls Cho’s, actually.” 

“Oh, yes. Yes,” the old man nodded, acting as though he knew what Seungyoun was talking about.

They finally sat down by their reserved table. Wooseok sat with his parents and Seungyoun sat by the other side with Cheetah. Wooseok thought of how nervous Seungyoun must have felt, but he never faltered, charming all those around them. All the higher class people assumed he was one of them- heir to a railroad fortune, perhaps. New money, obviously, but still a member of the club. 

Wooseok was amazed at how well the other was fitting in with them, but of course, his mother could always be counted upon to ruin that.

“Tell us of the accommodations in steerage, Mr Cho,” he’s mother suggested, Wooseok glared at her as she continued. “I hear they’re quite good on this ship.”

Wooseok looked back to Seungyoun ruefully, hoping that the other would not take too much offense from his mother’s words.

But Seungyoun surprised Wooseok once again by replying calmly.

“The best I’ve seen, ma’am. Hardly any rats.”

All the people around their table laughed in good humour, and it was then that Wooseok realised why his father had invited Seungyoun.

“Mr Cho is joining us from the third class,” Dongwook announced to the table. “He was of some assistance to our son last night.”

Wooseok felt anger boil inside him as he watched the other’s nod in understanding, looking at Seungyoun with new eyes.

“It turns out that Mr Cho is quite a fine artist,” Wooseok interjected, wanting to paint his new friend in better light. “He was kind enough to show me some of his work today.” 

“Wooseok and I differ in our definition of fine art,” his mother comments. “Not to impugn your work, sir,” she added innocently.

Seungyoun shook his hand to show that he wasn’t affected and Wooseok sent him another apologetic smile. 

The waiters started serving their meals and the males on the table continued their conversations.

“He knows every rivet in her, don’t you, Thomas?”

Wooseok recognised the man beside him as the designer of the ship and so he complimented him in respect. “Your ship is a wonder, Mr Andrews.”

“Thank you, Wooseok."

“And how do you take your caviar, sir?” Wooseok’s attention was then taken by the waiter inquiring Seungyoun of his preferences.

“No caviar for me, thanks,” Seungyoun kindly declined. “Never did like it much.”

He sent a knowing look to Wooseok, and the smaller man tried hard to hide his smile.

“And where, exactly, do you live, Mr Cho?” His mother asked suddenly as she took a bite off her meal. 

“Well, right now, my address is the R.M.S. Titanic,” Seungyoun answered truthfully. “After that, I’m in God's good humor.” 

“And how is it that you have means to travel?” 

Wooseok frowned at the implicating tone his mother was using.

"I work my way from place to place- You know, construction and such," Seungyoun answered, undeterred. "But I won my ticket on Titanic, here, at a lucky hand at poker," he glanced at Wooseok with a cheeky smile. "A very lucky hand." 

"All life is a game of luck," one of the other noble men in their table chipped in.

Dongwook clicked his tongue as he disagreed with him. "A real man makes his own luck, Archie. Right, Cho?"

Seungyoun nodded with a hum, and it was then that Wooseok really felt the tension emanating from his parents. 

"And you find that sort of rootless existence appealing, do you?" His mother asked derisively.

Cheetah gave his mother a pointed look as, for the first time since they sat down, a flash of resentment could be seen Seungyoun’s features. But it was only for a second, and then he was back to the charming young man answering Wooseok's mother's question.

"Well, yes, ma'am, I do."

He stunned everyone by admitting, Wooseok's mother narrowing her eyes at him. 

"I mean, I got everything I need right here with me," he said with content. "Got air in my lungs and a few blank sheets of paper."

Wooseok watched in wonder as Seungyoun took a bite out of his loaf of bread, continuing with no shame in his voice.

"I mean, I love waking up in the morning not knowing what's going to happen or who I'm going to meet-" 

Their eyes met as Seungyoun glanced at Wooseok again for a second. "- Or where I'm going to wind up."

"Just the other night, I was sleeping under a bridge, and now here I am on the grandest ship in the world having champagne with you fine people." The group laughed, appreciating the complement.

"I figure life's a gift, and I don't intend on wasting it. You never know what hand you're going to get dealt next." Seungyoun looked directly at Wooseok's father as he took a sip of his champagne before continuing. 

"You learn to take life as it comes at you. To make each day count."

A proud smile was etched onto Wooseok's face as Cheetah praised the young man. 

"Well said, Seungyoun."

"Hear, hear," the rest of the table agreed. 

"To making it count," Wooseok said with a wide smile, offering his glass out for the table to cheer.

Everyone, except for his parents, raised their glasses and repeated after him in cheer.

Wooseok ignored his parents disapproving looks as he drank his own champagne and talked with Seungyoun until they all finished their meals. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


They ate till they were all full. Wooseok had been quietly narrating to Seungyoun the happenings of their dinner parties a few moments before they actually happened, making it seem like he was a magician.

"Next it'll be brandies in the smoking room."

One of the high class men clapped his hand to gain the others attention, asking the men to join him for more drinks. All the older men agreed, nodding lazily as they stood up from their chairs.

"Now they retreat into a cloud of smoke and congratulate each other on being masters of the universe." Seungyoun smiled as they all thanked the ladies for their company, excusing themselves just as Wooseok had said.

"Quickly, Wooseok. Let's go," Dongwook prompted as he waited for his son to join them.

Wooseok was still sitting by the table with the ladies and Seungyoun. 

"I-uh," Wooseok didn't want to follow his father, he'd rather stay in Seungyoun's company. "I'm not quite feeling too well, father," he lied. "Besides, I think I'd like to spend more time with mother, if you don't mind."

Dongwook looked displeased, but his mother smiled sweetly as she shooed him away, happy that her son wanted to be with her at that moment. 

"Joining us, Cho?" One of the other men asked.

Seungyoun shook his head in refusal, leaving his seat nonetheless, much to Wooseok's dismay. 

"No, thanks. I've got to be heading back."

"Probably best. It'll be all business and politics, that sort of thing- Wouldn't interest you," Dongwook said with a smirk. They were all about to leave when he last regarded Seungyoun. "But Cho, good of you to come."

Wooseok scowled at his father's back, hating how degrading he sounded towards Seungyoun. Said man walked towards him, smiling gently as Wooseok tilted his head to look at him.

"Must you go, Seungyoun?" He asked with a sigh, thoroughly enjoying the taller man's presence. 

"Time for me to go row with the other slaves," Seungyoun joked, taking a firm hold onto Wooseok's hand for a shake.

"Good night, Wooseok."

Wooseok felt a folded piece of paper on his palm as Seungyoun let his hand go. Wooseok glanced at his mother to make sure that she didn't catch the moment, turning back on Seungyoun who gave him one final hopeful look before he was out of the hall.

Wooseok discreetly opened Seungyoun's note under the table, away from his mother, reading it's content. 

"Make it happen." 

The words were written on the paper in Seungyoun's scrawny handwriting. 

"Meet me at the clock."

Wooseok felt his pulse quicken as the possibility of meeting Seungyoun again, without his parents suffocating presence, enticed him greatly. 

He waited for a bit before he excused himself to the ladies, feigning the need for the washroom. His mother allowed him with no suspicions.

Wooseok had to discipline himself from sprinting to the top of the grand staircase where the big grandfather clock resides. 

But as he walked towards it, he could already see Seungyoun's broad back by the top of the stairs, watching as the hand ticked around every second that passed. 

Wooseok took a deep breath to control his beating heart, before walking up the stairs. 

Seungyoun turned at the sound of his footsteps, eyes crinkling in the corners as he charmingly smiled.

The taller man asked a simple question.

"So you want to go to a real party?"

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok was sitting down on a stool clapping his hands in rhythm as he watched Seungyoun dance with a little girl. Live music was playing loudly in the cramped room, but the people were jumping around merrily, dancing to the joyful sound of the fiddles and drums. 

He had said yes straight away when Seungyoun asked if he wanted to go to a real party. He didn't really care wherever it was, as long as the taller man was with him, he was sure he was going to have a lot of fun. 

And he was. The jolly feeling that everyone was feeling was infectious and he hadn't stopped smiling since he joined the party by the third class quarters with Seungyoun. 

He had met some interesting people as he drank beer, like the german man beside him trying to speak over the loud music. 

"Sprichst du Deutsch?"

"What?" Wooseok furrowed his brows as he tried to hear what the man was saying. 

"Sprichst du Deutsch?!" The man repeats louder, but Wooseok did not know the language. 

"I can't understand you," he shouts back. 

The sound of glass shattering made Wooseok jump slightly as a man nearby tumbled and accidentally pushed some drinks to the floor. 

Wooseok looked at Seungyoun, expecting a brawl to break out and not wanting to be around when it happens. 

But the men whose drinks were spilt didn't throw punches as Wooseok had predicted, instead they laughed and helped the man on the floor back up on his feet. 

Wooseok laughed as he found the scene warming, not quite understanding what was happening, but appreciating the inclusive and accepting atmosphere of the place. 

Wooseok turned his attention back to Seungyoun as the song ended, prompting the taller man to finish his dance with the cute little girl. 

"I'm gonna dance with him now, okay?" he said to her, pointing towards Wooseok's direction. Wooseok looked behind him to find no one else as Seungyoun took his hand in his. 

"What?" Wooseok asked as he was pulled up on his feet. 

“Come with me,” Seungyoun said, as the band started playing another fast tempo song. 

“What? Seungyoun-” Wooseok stayed on his spot, reluctant. “I can’t do this. I don’t know the steps.”

Seungyoun laughed as he pulled Wooseok closer. “Neither do I. How about we learn together?”

The taller man took hold of Wooseok’s hand, whilst his other hand laid on his waist. 

“Just go with. Don’t think,” Seungyoun whispered to his ear before he pulled the other to the middle of the dance floor.

Adrenaline rushed through Wooseok’s body as the upbeat music surrounded them. He could feel Seungyoun’s warm body against him, his comforting hold on his waist. He was feeling out of breath already but the excited look on Seungyoun’s face made him want to never stop. The sound of the other’s laughter was better than any other sound that Wooseok has ever heard and Wooseok shouted out in joy as the other led him around the dancing people. 

“Wait, Seungyoun, wait!” he squealed, not wanting to hit or bump onto other people. But Seungyoun guided him safely through them. 

Seungyoun’s attention was momentarily grabbed by his friend who was dancing with another girl on the big centre table of the room. His eyes brightened with an idea as he turned to Wooseok with a cheeky smile on his face. 

“Seungyoun, no-” Wooseok knew what the other was thinking without having the taller man say it. “Wait!”

Seungyoun just had the most beautiful smile Wooseok has ever seen as the taller man lifted him up to the table effortlessly. He quickly joined him and Wooseok clapped in delight as Seungyoun started freestyle dancing in front of him. The taller finished with a spin and looked expectantly at the shorter man. Wooseok was caught off guard for a second before his body moved as it wished as well. He never really danced before and so he knew he must have looked like an idiot, but Seungyoun was looking at him so encouragingly and supportively that he didn’t care what other people thought of him right then.

Seungyoun then grabbed both of his hands and started spinning them both around.

“Waaaah!” The taller man shouted as they went faster and faster. Wooseok’s heart was thumping hard in his chest as everything around them blurred and the only person he could clearly see was Seungyoun. 

Seungyoun and his sparkling eyes.

Seungyoun and his playful smile.

Seungyoun. Seungyoun. Seungyoun. 

Wooseok squealed with his eyes close as the taller man ended their spinning, carefully holding Wooseok upright as the rest of the world continued to spin in the smaller man’s eyes. He could hear Seungyoun’s laughter near his ear as he was guided to a chair where he sat with his eyes still closed, trying to ground himself back to the earth. 

There was a glass of beer placed on his hand and he opened his eyes to find Seungyoun looking at him slightly worried.

“You good?” he asked, and Wooseok nodded his head as he gulped down his drink in one go.

Wooseok laughed at the incredulous look on Seungyoun’s face, clutching his stomach as he tried to reign his laughter in. “What? You think I can’t drink?”

Seungyoun was starting to shake his head in response when someone bumped into him harshly, making him spill his own drink over Wooseok.

Seungyoun shoved the man back quickly, before turning back to Wooseok whose suit and top were now drenched in beer. 

“I’m so sorry,” the taller man grabbed some serviettes, helping Wooseok dry himself. 

“You alright?” To his surprise, Wooseok only giggled as he nodded, opting to take his suit coat off instead so that it was only his collared top that needed drying. He was sweating from all the dancing anyway, so he didn’t mind having less clothing on. 

Seungyoun took a seat beside him as they both watched all the people around them. One of Seungyoun’s friend sat with them and rolled his sleeve up to his elbow, resting it on the table, challenging Seungyoun with a smirk. Wooseok smiled as the other glanced at him briefly before he rolled his own sleeves up and took hold of the other man's hand. 

Wooseok was the one to signal them go, and people started gathering around them to spectate as the two man arm wrestled with all their might.

“Go! Go! Go!” Wooseok was cheering along with everyone as Seungyoun gained the upper hand. Screaming the taller man’s name when he finally was able to win the game. Seungyoun whooped in victory only to gulp in worry as a big burly man took his friend's place, offering his arm out for a match. 

Seungyoun didn’t look hopeful but he took up the other’s challenge nonetheless as the good sport that he was. It was clear that Seungyoun was no match for the other man, but he put up a good fight, the people around them rooting for the underdog shouting their support even when he inevitably lost. The big burly man stood up with a shout, soaking in his victory with a cocky smile as Seungyoun just good naturedly shook his head.

“Aha, God, I don’t mind losing but I hate how big his head gets whenever he wins,” Seungyoun joked, flexing his hand in pretend pain.

Wooseok tilted his head as he looked back to the big man, cracking his neck and wrist as he rolled his sleeves up. Seungyoun looked surprised but did not stop the smaller man as what Wooseok had expected. 

Wooseok cleared his throat to catch the burly man’s attention, but he was left ignored and so he had to tap the man on his shoulders as he offered his arm in challenge. 

The man snickered, pushing his arm away, not wanting to waste his time with the smaller man.

“What?” Wooseok asked. “Are you afraid that this small and privileged first class man will beat you?” he goated. 

The man turned menacingly at Wooseok and harshly took his hand with a deathly grip. It was then that Seungyoun seemed worried for him, but Wooseok gave him an assuring smile before he took a deep breath and focused on the game at hand. The man was twice his size but Wooseok was confident in his strength. When the game began, everyone was shocked at how the smaller man was able to keep up with the other. Wooseok clenched his teeth as his arm began to tire, self doubt starting to grow in his head as his strength began to falter. 

It seemed like he was going to lose when he heard a certain high toned voice over the loud cheering around him, encouraging him and feeling him with renewed strength.

“Keep going, Wooseok!”

“That’s it! Go, Wooseok!”

“You can do it! Believe in yourself!”

“Come on, Wooseok. Show them who’s the real man!”

Wooseok grunted as he pushed as hard as he could, pushing the man’s arm down to the table, beating him. The crowd around him erupted into cheer, and Wooseok jumped on his feet in excitement. Seungyoun stood up too, shouting words of congratulations to him. 

Wooseok didn’t know whether it was the rush from winning, or the electrifying energy around them, or just the wholesome expression on Seungyoun’s face, but he just had the overwhelming need to embrace the taller man in front of him. 

And so he did. Wooseok wrapped his arms around the Seungyoun’s shoulders and, surprisingly, the taller man also grabbed him by the waist, lifting Wooseok and spinning him around again. 

He could hear the high toned laughter clearly as he held onto the other tighter. Wooseok could smell the sweat and the scent of petrichor against Seungyoun’s neck. 

“I’m so proud of you,” Seungyoun whispered, and Wooseok could feel the fast beating of the other’s heart against his own chest. 

When Seungyoun finally settled him down on his feet, looking down to the shorter man’s eyes with a soft smile, Wooseok realised he was in trouble.

Wooseok stepped back, keeping space between them as he scratched his neck. The time by the wall clock caught his attention as he realised that he had been down there for almost two hours. That was way longer than he had planned to be away from his mother and he would definitely have trouble explaining where he was. Seungyoun seemed to know what the other was thinking and so he took his arm as they both went back out to the main deck. 

Wooseok shivered as they went outside. His coat had not dried yet, and his collared shirt alone was not enough to keep him warm.

Again, it seemed like Seungyoun could read his mind, as the taller man removed his own coat. 

"It's not as fancy as yours but it'll keep you warm," Seungyoun muttered as he placed it over Wooseok's shoulders.

"Oh, no," Wooseok didn't wasn't to impose the other. "You'll get cold too."

Seungyoun shook his head as he insisted. "I'm a Chippewa Falls boy, remember? I'm used to the cold."

Wooseok wanted to argue back but it seemed like the taller man was determined. Plus he didn't mind having Seungyoun's scent surrounding him. 

They walked in comfortable silence for a little bit, enjoying each other's quiet company. 

He hoped that, this time, Seungyoun would not be able to hear his thoughts as his mind was racing from his epiphany.

The sound of violins playing could be heard when the two reached the first class quarters, Wooseok looking at the sign regrettably as he turned to Seungyoun. 

"Here we are," Wooseok said as he gave back the coat to the owner. 

"Right," Seungyoun replied as he accepted it back. 

Wooseok sighed as he looked at the others gentle face for a few quiet seconds before he spoke. 

"I don't want to go back," he confessed with a bittersweet smile. His eyes then drifted to the skies, where thousands of stars shone throughout the night. 

"Look," he whispered in wonder. "It's beautiful."

The taller man tilted his head to view the stars with him. "Yeah," he agreed.

"So vast and endless. We're so small." Wooseok appreciated the beauty above him, before a thought made him scoff. 

"My crowd- they think they're giants. They're not even dust in God's eyes."

Seungyoun laughed. "You know, there's been a mistake."

Wooseok turned to him in question. 

"You're not one of them," the taller man clarified. "You got mailed to the wrong address."

"I did, didn't I?" Wooseok chuckled as another thing caught his attention. 

"Oh look, a shooting star!"

Wooseok smiled as they both watched it fly across the sky. 

"You know what my father used to tell me," Seungyoun whispered. "Every time you saw one, it was a soul going to heaven."

Wooseok blinked, thinking about how warm and happy the concept made him feel. 

"I like that," he said, before looking back at the other. 

"Are we supposed to wish on it?"

Seungyoun looked away from the stars to focus on the shorter man and Wooseok wondered how it seemed like none of the stars above them were brighter than the ones in Seungyoun's eyes. 

"Why?" Seungyoun asked. "What would you wish for?"

Wooseok's gaze lowered to the others lips, knowing exactly what he would wish for.

"Something I can't have," he answered, before he moved away from the other to go back to where he belonged. 

"Good night, Seungyoun."

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"I had hoped for you to join us gentlemen's after last night's dinner," Dongwook said as he rejected the waitress' offer for coffee. The two of them were having breakfast in their quarters as per Dongwook's instructions, Wooseok's mother opting to have breakfast with her friends instead.

Wooseok had managed to sneak back into his room the night before without seeing his parents, and surprisingly, they did not come to his room to question him on his whereabouts. 

"I was not feeling well," he replied in regards to the others last statement.

"Your exertions below decks were no doubt exhausting."

Wooseok looked at his father's eyes, shocked that the other knew his time in the third class deck. How did he know? Did one of his friends see him go down there? Did one of the staff tattletail? Wooseok's mind searched for any other way until his eyes fell onto his father's butler at the corner of the room. 

"I see you had that undertaker of a manservant follow me," Wooseok said, rolling his eyes. "How typical."

"You will never behave like that again, Wooseok. Do you understand?"

Wooseok clenched his jaw as he watched his father look at him with lazy eyes, talking calmly.

"I'm not a foreman in one of your mills that you can command, father," he said defiantly.

He had expected his father to raise his voice, to shout at him, but he did not expect him to slam his fist on the table unexpectedly.

"No, you are not. You are my son!" 

Wooseok jumped as Dongwook pushed the table aside, breaking all the cups and plates on the floor.

"You are my son and you will be the heir to my business. I have taught and educated you to be a smart and respectable young man and I will not have you be influenced by a lowlife. And you will not waste all my hard work and effort by associating with those lower class dirt!"

Dongwook pulled the younger man by his collar as Wooseok looked back at his father, wide-eyed. His father had never been physical before and Wooseok was definitely shaken. 

"You do not want to cross me any further," Dongwook warned with a sinister voice. "Is this any way unclear, Wooseok?"

"N-no," he stuttered, terrified of the implications in his father's words. 

"Good."

Dongwook relaxed his grip, not sparing the younger man another glance as he left the room and all the mess he had made in his anger with Wooseok.

Wooseok first felt his knees wobble before he realised he had fallen on his knees. He had wrapped himself into a foetal position as he felt the hot tears running down his cheeks. 

He was a coward.

Seungyoun was right. He was a coward and will forever be a coward. 

His father had not even said much words, did not even physically hurt him, and yet he was so very afraid at that moment. 

Why couldn't he have held his ground? Why couldn't he stand up for himself for once? 

Wooseok felt very small and weak as he hugged himself in comfort.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok was silently getting ready for their Sunday service. He had managed to pick himself up and lock himself in his room for the rest of the morning, until he was told that they were required to attend the service. He was buttoning his shirt when a knock interrupted the silence. His mother entered his room without even waiting for his word, pursing her lips as she looked at him through the mirror. 

"Mothe-" Wooseok cleared his throat, voice still raw from all his crying. 

His mother lightly slapped his hands away as she took hold of the last two buttons of his shirt and buttoned them fully even though it was tight around Wooseok's neck. 

"You're not to see that boy again, do you understand me?" she said coldly as she tucked in his shirt and motioned for him to turn around so she could do the same on the back.

"But mother-"

She turned him around and grabbed his tie and began knotting it around his neck just as she used to do when he was a child. 

"I see how you look at him."

Wooseok's heart began racing as he looked down to his mother's eyes that were focused on his tie at that moment. 

"I see how you look at him and I wonder what I have done wrong in raising you."

Wooseok swallowed a lump in his throat as his mother finally looked him in the eyes. 

"Mother, I-"

"Wooseok, you are a man," she said sharply, pulling his tie tight around his neck, almost choking him.

"That Seungyoun boy is also a man."

"You're both men, and yet you look at him like a lover."

Wooseok felt like his breath was knocked out of him now that his mother had spoken the words out loud.

"Do you understand how wrong that is?" she asked. "How disappointed your father will be if he ever finds out?"

Wooseok closed his eyes as he nodded his head in silent agreement.

"You must put an end to these silly games," she insisted. "I don't know what filth that rat had poisoned your mind with but-"

"He is not a rat," Wooseok interjected, not liking how she looked down on Seungyoun. 

The sound of palm slapping skin resonated in Wooseok's room as he felt the sharp sting on his cheeks. 

"Kim Wooseok, how dare you speak over your mother?" Wooseok kept his eyes downcasted as she continued. 

"See how disrespectful you are already by just spending some time with those uncivilized people. Even worse is you lusting over a man. Have you no shame for me? For your father?"

Wooseok bit his tongue until he could taste blood. He tried hard not to show his weakness but he could not stop the tears from escaping his eyes yet again. 

"Oh, my boy, do not cry," his mother whispered as she pulled him down to wrap her arms around him. "I am doing this for your own good, you know that, right?"

"You will marry Sakura, and have many children and you will flourish as a successful family man."

Wooseok sobbed against her shoulder. 

That's not what he wants. 

"There. There," he felt her kiss his forehead. "Go wash your face again and we will wait for you outside so that we can all go to the mass together."

She left, leaving Wooseok wondering why he had not jumped off the ship when he had the chance. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


After the mass, Wooseok had followed his father as the designer of the ship toured the noble men around the vessel. 

"Excuse me, sir. Another ice warning. This one's from the Noordam..."

Wooseok overheard the conversation between the captain and his co-captain as they walked past the wheelhouse. 

Mr Andrews guided them to keep going when something bothered Wooseok.

“Mr Adrews, forgive me…” he approached the older man. “I did the sum in my head and with the number of lifeboats times the capacity you mentioned… it seems that there are not enough for everyone aboard.”

The older man smiled as he nodded his head. “Wooseok, you miss nothing, do you?”

“About half, actually,” he said. “ln fact, I put in these new type davits which can take an extra row of boats inside this one but it was thought by some that the deck would look too cluttered so I was overruled.”

Wooseok frowned as his father chuckled. “Waste of deck space as it is on an unsinkable ship.”

They continued on, walking past the spare lifeboats when he felt someone grab him by the arm and Wooseok had his fist ready for whoever it was only to drop it as he realised it was Seungyoun. 

The taller man had a finger over his lips as he looked around them, before pulling Wooseok into an empty room. 

"Seungyoun, I'm sorry but I can't do this," Wooseok whispered as the other closed the door.

"Wait, what's wrong, Wooseok?" Seungyoun asked with a soft voice, worriedly looking at the other.

Wooseok bit his lips as he tried to ignore the flutter of his heart. 

"Nothing, but I'm sorry, I should be out there following them right now."

Wooseok tried to open the door only for Seungyoun to stand in his way. 

"Wait, I just wanted to talk to you."

"No, Seungyoun. No," Wooseok struggled to talk past the lump in his throat. The other opened his mouth to talk but the shorter man interrupted him, knowing that he would crumble from the other’s words.

“Seungyoun, I… the...” Wooseok struggled to say the words out loud. “The last two days I’ve spent with you feels like a beautiful dream…”

“They’ve been the happiest...” he continued with a wavering voice. “And most magical moments of my life.” 

Wooseok’s voice cracked at the end, and he hoped he was able to fully express to the other how much he appreciated being able to experience such happiness in his restricting life.

“But I have to wake up to the reality now.”

Seungyoun frowned as he stepped closer to wipe Wooseok’s cheeks. “Wait, no. Don’t cry.”

Wooseok didn’t even realise that he was crying but the caring manner of the taller man just pushes him to cry even more.

“No, you’re right. I shouldn’t cry, because real men don’t cry.”

Seungyoun clicked his tongue in irritation. “Stop that,” he said firmly.

“Wooseok, I know you’re not perfect,” Seungyoun said honestly. “All right, you have too much pride, can be a bit naive at times.” 

Wooseok huffed in offence.

“But you’re also one of the boldest, strongest...” Seungyoun racked his brain for the right adjectives. “...most bravest man that I’ve ever know and-”

Wooseok preferred hearing the jabs from before rather than all these sweet words from the other’s mouths. “Seungyoun, I-”

“No, let me try to get this out,” the taller man heaved in frustration. “I'm not an idiot. I know how the world works.” Seungyoun looked at Wooseok earnestly. 

“I've got ten bucks in my pocket. I have nothing to offer you and even if I do, I know what your stance is with men loving other men.” Wooseok’s heart broke at how dejected the other man sounded. 

“I understand, okay? But I'm too involved now. You jump, I jump, remember?” Seungyoun reminds him. “I can't turn away without knowing you'll be alright. That's all that I want.”

Wooseok felt so much love and passion from the taller man but he knew that it was pointless to entertain such thoughts.

“Well, I'm fine,” he lies through his teeth. “I'll be fine, really.”

“Really?” Seungyoun asked, searching Wooseok’s eyes for the truth, shaking his head. “I don't think so.”

“They've got you trapped, Wooseok,” he was sounding desperate. “And you're going to die if you don't break free- Maybe not right away because you're strong,” Seungyoun lifted his hands up when the smaller man opened his mouth to talk.

“You’re strong but sooner or later that fire that I love about you, Wooseok…”

Wooseok’s heart skipped a beat at the word “love”.

“That fire is going to burn out.”

Wooseok was so tempted. He was so tempted to lean his head on Seungyoun’s shoulder and release all the stress and worries he had been feeling his entire life. But the other was right when he said that he had too much pride, and even though he was so tempted to do that, his pride still would not let him.

“It's not up to you to save me, Seungyoun.”

Seungyoun looked lost for a moment after that, but with renewed strength he moved closer until their faces were only an inch apart. 

“You're right. Only you can do that.”

Wooseok was speechless as the other looked from his eyes to his lips. And he knew what the other was intending to do. He knew and a part of him wanted the taller man to do it. 

But just before their lips touched, Wooseok turned his face away.

“I'm going back,” he whispered, turning to open the door, Seungyoun not moving to stop him anymore.

“Leave me alone,” he ordered, before closing the door.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Have you ever thought of expanding the firm to other regions, Dongwook?"

Wooseok was sitting beside his father as Dongwook and the other noblemen rested in the smoking room. The room was hot and stuffy, just as it always was. No one spoke to him or even acknowledged his presence as the other men conversed. 

"...Well, actually. Yes I was..." 

Wooseok was never interested in his father's business talk, and even if the firm was his future, he thinks he would never take interest in the manner ever. 

"...After my boy marries the governor's daughter, I'm sure we would be able to further develop into a bigger business..."

Wooseok's eyes wandered around the room, trying to look for something, anything, interesting that would keep him from snoozing. 

"...My, your son sure is lucky to bag such a beauty…"

A small boy finally captured Wooseok's attention, crouching slightly as he sat besides his parents. 

"... Never thought your boy would be as smart as to marry such a high class woman…"

The boy was enjoying his dessert, leaving chocolate residue around his mouth as he swallowed the last spoonful of his cake. He looked so happy, smiling as he savoured its sweetness.

"... Just as he should. Not like Park’s boy, caught sucking another man’s cock…"

The boy's father shook his head in disappointment as he looked at the mess on the boy's face, throwing a cloth to him with an order to clean up. Wooseok frowned. His father had done the same thing to him when he was younger.

"... Disgusting, I say. Imagine raising your son to be a fag…"

The boy was then told to sit up straighter, to square up his shoulders. Wooseok found himself sitting straighter too.

“... I would disown him in an instant…”

The happy child from before was now transformed to a sullied and downcast boy. 

Gears turned in Wooseok’s mind.

“... Hear. Hear. No son of mine will dishonour my name…”

The spark in the young boy’s eyes were gone, replaced by emptiness. 

Those eyes then turned to Wooseok and that was when he realised…

It was like he was looking at a mirror. 

“... I’d rather have him killed then spread shame for our family…”

It was like a veil was lifted off his eyes, and he could clearly see his whole situation. 

“... Enough, I don’t want to hear of them anymore…”

Why is he letting his father ruin his happiness? Why is he letting him dull his spark?   
Why is he allowing him to burn his fire out?

Wooseok stood up. All the men by his table, as well his father, looked at him in question.

Wooseok excused himself despite his father’s firm voice telling him otherwise.

He exited the room. Wooseok doesn’t know if it was just because he was able to escape the smoke room, but it felt like he was able to finally take a breath of fresh air. 

Wooseok walked around, ignoring the cold harsh air as he searched for the one his heart has been longing for. Wooseok hoped he wasn’t too late. 

He finally found him. Standing by the edge of the ship where they first met. 

Wooseok stood a couple of feet away from him, unsure if the other would still accept him.

“H-hello, Seungyoun,” he called out. 

Seungyoun turned at the sound of his voice, face bath by the light from the sunset behind him, making him look like an angel.

“I’ve changed my mind,” he tells the taller man. 

Wooseok took a couple of steps towards the other as he watched Seungyoun smile.

“They said you might be-”

“Shhh.” Seungyoun hushed him, a finger over his lips. “Give me your hand.”

Wooseok looked at the other’s extended hand before placing his own over his.

Seungyoun gently pulled the shorter man towards him. 

“Now close your eyes.” Seungyoun chuckled when Wooseok hesitated. “Go on.”

Wooseok took a deep breath before closing his eyes, relying fully on the taller man.

“Step up.”

Wooseok did. Holding onto Seungyoun’s hand more firmly, as he felt the taller man’s other hand by his lower back.

“Now hold on to the railing.” Wooseok’s heart was beating wildly as he followed the other’s instructions. 

“Keep your eyes closed, don’t peak,” Seungyoun reminds him. 

Wooseok smiled at the other’s playful tone. “I’m not,” he said.

“Step up onto the rail.”

Wooseok stepped carefully, feeling the other’s comforting warmth behind him. Not caring about the strong winds flowing past his face.

“Hold on,” Seungyoun adds. “Keep your eyes closed,” he repeats making Wooseok giggle. 

“Do you trust me?” Seungyoun whispered to his ear and Wooseok felt a shiver run down his spine as he nodded his head.

“I trust you,” he replies. And he does. With all of his heart. 

Wooseok felt Seungyoun’s hands gently grab his, slowly lifting and extending both arms up in the air. 

“Alright,” Seungyoun then supported Wooseok’s waist. 

“Open your eyes.”   
Wooseok gasped as he opened his eyes to see the horizon where the setting sun was meeting the sea. He felt Seungyoun wrap his arms around his waist, head leaning on his shoulder beside his face.

“I’m flying! Seungyoun!” Wooseok exclaimed.

Wooseok felt an incredible sense of freedom as he looked at the sea around them, now tinged in orange and serenity.

It was like he became a bird that could freely fly around as he wished, no longer caged and trapped.

Seungyoun’s hands roamed up to hold Wooseok’s, fingers caressing and entwining together.

Wooseok turned his head to look at the other, as their arms wrapped around him in a loose embrace. 

His face was so close. Seungyoun’s face was so close. Wooseok gazed at the other’s features, trying hard to engrave all his beauty in his memory and Seungyoun looked at him like he was doing the same. 

This time, when the taller man leaned down closer, Wooseok stayed to feel Seungyoun’s lips against his. 

Seungyoun was so gentle, soft lips fluttering against his own.

Wooseok had never kissed anyone before.

Seungyoun pressed their lips more firmly together and slowly traced Wooseok’s lower lip with his tongue, silently asking for entrance. 

Wooseok let him in, tasting and feeling all the love the taller man was pouring into that kiss and Wooseok had never felt so complete.

He had never felt so whole, so content in his life, until that very moment, wrapped in Seunyoun’s arms, kissing the man he loves.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“It’s quite proper, I assure you,” Wooseok giggled as he let Seungyoun into his quarters. 

They had continued kissing for what felt like forever by the edge of the ship, when Wooseok had the brilliant idea for the taller man to draw him.

“This is the sitting room,” he motions around the area as Seungyoun looked around the place. 

“Will this light do?” Wooseok asked worriedly as he took off his coat and placed it on the rack.

“What?” Seungyoun asked as he turned to look at the shorter man with an innocent smile.

“Don’t artists need good light?” 

Seungyoun chuckled as he put on a horrible french accent. 

“That is true but I’m not used to working in such horrible conditions!”

Wooseok laughed, taking the taller men's coat as well.

"Monet!" Seungyoun exclaimed, rushing to the painting by the wall.

"Do you know his work?" Wooseok asked, wondering if Seungyoun had the same opinion as his mother's.

"Of course. Look at his use of color here."

Wooseok watched as the other marveled at the techniques used in the painting.

"Isn't he great?" Seungyoun asked in awe.

Wooseok smiled as he answered. "I know, it's extraordinary."

Seungyoun continued to look at Wooseok's collection of paintings as the shorter man dialed the knob of his father's safe, looking for his most expensive cigars. 

"Father insists on hiding them in this annoying little thing," Wooseok said as he finally opened it. 

"Must have important things in there," Seungyoun muttered as he eyed one of Wooseok's favorite paintings.

"If important means most expensive, then yes," Wooseok sighed as he handed one cigar to Seungyoun, knowing that the other smokes. Said man smiled as he took the cigar but put it in his pocket instead of lighting it like what Wooseok expected. 

"I know you don't like the smell of smoke," Seungyoun muttered as his attention turned back on the paintings. 

Wooseok smiled at how caring the other was, placing the cigars back in the safe and accidentally bumping his mother's ring out of its case in the safe.

It rolled on the floor to Seungyoun's feet and the taller bent down to pick it up. 

"Phew," Seungyoun blew out. "What is this, sapphire?" He asked as he handed the ring back to Wooseok.

"A diamond," Wooseok clarified as he carefully put it back in its case. "A very rare diamond."

Wooseok turned his head to his right where another item caught his attention immediately.

Wooseok took his top hat, flipping it between his hands as he walked towards the other. 

"That's nice," Seungyoun said as Wooseok showed him the gold emblem. 

"It's the king of the jungle, the great lion," he explains as the taller man took hold of the hat. 

Wooseok licked his lips as he thought about what he had in mind for Seungyoun's drawing of him.

"Seungyoun, I want you to draw me like one of your French boys… wearing this."

Wooseok was apprehensive as Seungyoun nodded in acceptance of the request. "Alright."

"Wearing only this," Wooseok clarified.

Seungyoun paused as he processed what the other man had asked of him. 

His eyes fell on Wooseok's face and then down his body, before turning away his blushing face as he cleared his throat. 

Wooseok smiled cheekily as he left the top hat in Seungyoun's hands, skipping to his room to get himself ready. 

"Feel free to move the furniture around how you'd like them," he said before closing the door.

Wooseok took a deep breath as he looked at himself in his mirror. 

His heart was racing as he put on his robe over his naked body. He didn't know what possessed him to do this, but he wanted to show all of him to Seungyoun. Wooseok wanted the other to see him just as he was, without any of his expensive clothes and jewels. He wanted Seungyoun to see him as his equal. 

Just a normal man. 

Who happens to love another man. 

Wooseok walked out of his room to find Seungyoun sitting down preparing his tools. The top hat was placed on a small table in front of Seungyoun and Wooseok wondered if he should grab it now quickly, not wanting for the other to see his nakedness too close.

But then as he watched Seungyoun look up from his charcoal and paper, Wooseok remembers that Seungyoun had already seen his soul, his faults, and yet he still was there for him. 

Wooseok cleared his throat as he chuck a penny to the other man. 

"Now that I'm a paying customer. I expect good quality art to come off this," he jokes, trying to shake his nerves.

"I'll try, my good sir," Seungyoun said with a teasing smile. "Although, I don't think anyone will ever be able to capture and replicate your beauty."

Wooseok felt his cheeks flush at the other's compliment. Seungyoun seemed pleased with how affected the shorter man was with his words, until Wooseok decided to turn the tables around and drop the robe off his body.

The first thought that went through Wooseok's mind was that it was a bit cold in the room, but then the sight of Seungyoun's eyes widening and the way he gulped as he looked over Wooseok's body appreciatively gave the shorter man a brief sense of bravado.

He liked how slightly nervous Seungyoun was. Despite having experience drawing many people in the past, Wooseok liked that he was able to get this sort of reaction from him.

Wooseok slowly walked closer to the other man and picked up the top hat to put it on his head. 

He didn't really have a plan after that and so he stood there in front of Seungyoun until the other man cleared his throat.

"Um, over on the bed- I mean, the chair," Seungyoun corrected himself.

Wooseok chuckled as he walked to where the other was pointing, pulling the chair out from the table and sitting normally.

"How about... you keep the chair facing the table," Seungyoun suggested. 

"Then maybe you can prop up your legs on the… yeah. But keep your torso facing me..."

Wooseok followed the other's instructions, placing his legs on the table and looking back at the other for more suggestions. 

"Tell me when it looks right," Wooseok mumbles as he tries to sit more comfortably. 

"Put your left leg back the way it was," Seungyoun said, watching carefully as the other man does as he says. "Right… Bend your right leg up a bit."

"Now, rest your right elbow on your knee and lean your head forward so that that hand is supporting your head... but use it also to keep the hat in place." 

Wooseok found himself finding the pose surprisingly comfortable.

"Just keep your left hand relaxed like that… Eyes to me," Seungyoun said with a small smile. "Keep them on me. And try to stay still."

Wooseok did just that, keeping his eyes trained on the other as Seungyoun took a deep breath and picked up his charcoal and paper. 

Seungyoun licked his lips as he glanced at Wooseok again. Wooseok sent him a shy smile as the other began sketching him, looking back up every now and again as he carefully drew the details of Wooseok’s body. 

Wooseok’s heart was pounding in his chest as Seungyoun’s eyes roamed his upper body. This was the most erotic thing he had ever done in his life, and he couldn’t believe that he was really sitting down in the nude, modeling for a drawing.

Wooseok could tell how focus the other was based on the furrows of the artist’s brows and his pursed lips. 

“Yah, why so serious,” he called out, wanting the other to smile more.

Seungyoun flashed him a brief smile, before he continued with the sketch. 

A few minutes passed as Seungyoun’s eyes travelled lower down his body and Wooseok began feeling self conscious again as he thought about all the skin he was showing. 

But then Seungyoun gulped as he began turning pink and Wooseok couldn’t hide his satisfaction from the other’s reactions. 

“I believe you are blushing, Mr Big Artiste,” he teased, making the other bite his lips.

“I can’t imagine Monsieur Monet blushing,” he adds.

“He does landscapes,” Seungyoun contends. “Just relax your face. No laughing.”

Wooseok took a deep breath as he tried to reign in the giggle he wanted to release and control his face to the chic look he usually has.

As Seungyoun continued sketching him, Wooseok began feeling more and more comfortable under the other’s gaze. Feeling his self conscious ebb away as he let Seungyoun see every inch of him, just as he is.

There was no judgement in Seungyoun’s eyes, there was only respect and appreciation, and it showed through his sketch as Wooseok looked over the other’s shoulder, waiting as he finished it with his initials.

CSY April 14 1912.

Seungyoun placed the sketch on a thick folder and presented it to Wooseok, who was smiling from ear to ear. 

“Thank you,” Wooseok whispered, before leaning down to kiss Seungyoun, wanting to taste the other’s lips once again.

He could feel Seungyoun smiling as they kissed and Wooseok giggled as he pulled away before he was tempted to go any further.

Wooseok looked at the clock to see that more time had passed than he initially thought, and so he gave the folder back to Seungyoun, asking him to put it in the safe and to lock it as he quickly changed into clothes.

The air was getting colder and Wooseok was considering wearing a thicker coat as he walked back to where Seungyoun was. The taller man had his hands deep in his own pockets in an attempt to keep warm.

“It's getting cold,” Seungyoun observed as someone knocked on his door.

“Mr Kim,” a voice called out and he realised it was his father’s butler looking for him. 

Wooseok quickly took Seungyoun’s hand and pulled him to another room that had a door they could exit to.

As they managed to walk out to the main hallway, Wooseok hoped they had lost the other man but as he glanced back, he realised that they were still being followed.

“Come on!” Wooseok shouts as he pulls the taller man to a run. Adrenaline was rushing through his veins yet again as the butler chased them around.

“Wait! Wait! Wait!” Seungyoun shouted to the operator as he began closing the elevator.

“Go, go! Down, down!” the taller man insisted when they managed to enter the lift. 

“Quickly! Quickly!” Wooseok added as the butler almost reached them.

The two of them giggled as they descended down, Wooseok flipping the old man the bird in defiance. 

Once they were down the next level, Seungyoun quickly opened the railing, apologising to the people they accidentally bumped into. It felt like they were in a high as they held each other’s hands, running to nowhere in particular, hoping that they had lost their chaser.

“Pretty tough for a valet, this fellow,” Seungyoun panted as they hid by another corridor. “Seems more like a cop.”

Wooseok laughed as he tried to catch his breath as well. “I think he was,” he commented.

Seungyoun must’ve seen the older man as he swore under his breath and took Wooseok’s hand again. It seemed like they reached a dead end but Seungyoun luckily found a door where they went through.

They were near the ship’s engines based on the loud sound of mechanics that were blaring.

“Now what?” Wooseok shouted, covering his ears. Seungyoun looked around and pointed to the stairs leading lower down. 

They found themselves by the boilers, where the ship’s workers worked hard to maintain the engines of the ship, shoving coal on the boilers, withstanding the heat and steam that resulted from their work.

“Hold up! What’re you two doing down here?” one of the workers shouts at them. “You shouldn’t be down here. It could be dangerous! Oii!”

They took off again, past all the men working hard to keep the ship sailing. 

“Carry on! Don't mind us,” Seungyoun tells them. “You’re doing a great job! Keep up the good work!”

They ran until they reached the area where all the cargo was placed. Wooseok rubbed his arms as the temperature became more obviously lower as they left the boiler room. 

“Ah, look at what we have here, huh?” Seungyoun muttered as they walked closer to one of the carriages. Seungyoun went straight to admiring the nice paint job but Wooseok cleared his throat. Seungyoun turned to him and smiled when he realised what the other wanted.

The taller man opened the door and Wooseok thanked him as he entered the carriage.

Seungyoun sat by the driver’s seat, honking the horn. The sound echoed through the cargo area as Wooseok lowered down the window.

“Where to, Sir?” Seungyoun asked with a jolly smile.

Wooseok giggled as he leaned close to the other’s ear. 

“To the stars,” he whispered before pulling the taller man in through the window.

Seungyoun laughed as he sat back with Wooseok, wrapping his arm around the other.

His other hand was playing with Wooseok’s fingers as they looked deep into each other’s eyes.

Wooseok never thought he would ever be in this situation. First off, he never thought he would ever feel this way for someone and moreover he never expected for that person to return them back. Since he had met Seungyoun, Wooseok had experienced so many things he thought he would never have in his life. He made a friend, someone who cared for him, someone who respected him. Someone who wasn’t afraid to fight for him, someone who was looking at him like he was the most important person in the world.

“You’re so beautiful,” Seungyoun said as his eyes took in every feature of his face, taking his time as though they had all the time in the world. Then his eyes wandered down and something ignited within Wooseok as he felt the other’s gaze on his body.

Wooseok licked his lips and Seungyoun’s eyes quickly followed the movement, Adam's apple bobbing as he gulped. 

They were sitting very close to each other, their body heat keeping the two warm in the cold cargo area. Wooseok could feel the other’s strong and broad chest and his eyes wandered down Seungyoun’s neck. A growing sense of desire bubbled within him and when his eyes connected with the other, he knew that Seungyoun wanted him too.

Wooseok leaned forward to kiss the other, trying to satiate the hunger he was feeling but as their lips moved against each other, he still felt like it was not enough. Wooseok grabbed the other’s head and pulled him closer, wanting to be as close to him as possible. He didn’t know how but he found himself lying on his back with Seungyoun on top of him and when the taller man broke their kiss he could see the lust in the other’s eyes.

“Is this alright?” Seungyoun asked, voice deeper than normal.

Although his heart was beating hard, Wooseok knew that it was from anticipation rather than nervousness. He nodded shyly and Seungyoun smiled gently as Wooseok took their entwined fingers and kissed each of the taller man’s fingers tenderly. 

“Put your hands on me, Seungyoun.”

  
  
  
  
  


They ran out to the main deck, laughing as they managed to fool the crewmen looking for them. They were able to bask in their afterglow for a bit before the sound of footsteps rushed them to change and sneak out of the cargo area. 

“Did you see those guy’s faces?” Seungyoun asked in laughter. “Did you see the…”   
Wooseok hushed him by placing a finger over the other’s lips, looking earnestly as the taller man as he informed him of his plan.

“When the ship docks…” Wooseok began. “I’m getting off with you.”

“This is crazy,” Seungyoun mutters in awe.

Wooseok chuckled. “It doesn’t make any sense,” he agreed. “But that’s why I trust it.”

Wooseok felt so much love for this man in front of him, again, he never knew he would ever feel this way for someone else. Never knew that he would ever find someone who accepts him, the real Wooseok. The man who literally saved his life and showed him what true living really meant.

And soon, when the ship arrives by docks, Wooseok would be able to live his life away from his parents, away from all their expectations, and with the love of his life.

They drew closer once again, pouring all their love for one another into the kiss. Despite the cold breeze around them, they remain warm from each other’s embrace. 

Then suddenly, the ship shook. 

They broke their kiss to look around, only to see a giant iceberg right by the side of the ship. 

“Get back!” Seungyoun warned the smaller man as ice chipped off onto the deck. They could hear the loud groan of the ship as the iceberg scraped its side. 

A few other passengers walked out to look over the edge, the two of them amongst them. 

The ship had passed by the ice already and, at first glance, it seemed that it did little damage. 

“Well, it looks alright,” Seungyoun mutters. “I don’t see anything.”

“You don’t think it damaged the ship?” Wooseok asked absentmindedly, picking up a small chunk of ice from the floor as the taller man kept looking over the edge.

“It seemed like a big bump but I think we’re alright.”

Wooseok watched as the taller man turned his head to look back at the iceberg and slowly put the ice to the others neck and down his shirt. 

“Argh!” Seungyoun squealed at the coldness, trying to take the ice out as Wooseok laughed. 

“That’s it!” Seungyoun said as he gave up, wrapping his arms around the smaller man's waist. “You’re going overboard! You’re going overboard!”

Wooseok screamed as Seungyoun held him close to the edge of the ship before he managed to break free, running away as Seungyoun chased him, the sound of his laughter following him. 

They walked up to the first class deck where they saw the captain and his crew men talking amongst each other. 

“Boiler room six is flooded eight feet above the plate.” 

“And the mail hold is worse. She's all buckled in in the forward hold.” 

“Can you shore up?” 

“Not unless the pumps get ahead.”

“Have you seen the damage in the mail hold?” 

“No, she's already underwater.”

Seungyoun watched them as they walked past them with worried eyes. “This is bad,” the taller man said.

Wooseok looked at the other, finally sensing the severity of their situation.

“We should tell mother and father,” he suggested.

They made their way quickly to his quarters, Seungyoun’s steps faltering as they saw the butler by the entrance. 

“Maybe, I should-” 

“Just stay by my side,” Wooseok tells him, keeping his chin up as they passed the older man.

“We’ve been looking for you, sir,” the old man said, walking uncomfortably close behind them. 

Wooseok sighed just before they entered the room, preparing himself for the confrontation he will have with his parents but wanting to warn them first of the incident with the iceberg.

“Something serious has happened-” he began.

“Yes, it has,” his father interrupted. 

“Indeed. Two things dear to me and your mother disappeared this evening. Now that one is back, I have a pretty good idea where to find the other.”

Wooseok furrowed his brows, confused as to what his father was referring to. 

“Search him,” Dongwook pointed at Seungyoun.

“Now what?” Seungyoun protested as the security man took his coat off forcefully. 

Wooseok watched, baffled at what they were doing at that moment.

“Father, what are you doing? We’re in the middle of an emergency. What’s going on-”

“Is this it?” the security asked, taking a ring out of Seungyoun’s pocket. 

“That’s it,” Dongwook confirmed, taking the ring back and returning it to his wife. 

It was his mother’s ring, Wooseok realised. The one they kept locked in the safe. Why… Why was it in Seungyoun’s pocket?

The room was quiet for a moment as Wooseok tried to digest what he had just seen.

“This is horseshit!” Seungyoun exclaimed, looking at Wooseok fervently. 

“Don’t you believe it, Wooseok. Don’t!”

Wooseok’s mind was blank as he tried to make sense of what was happening.

“He couldn’t have…” he muttered.

“Of course, he could,” Dongwook said. “It’s easy enough for a professional.”   
Wooseok shook his head as they cuffed Seungyoun’s wrists. 

“But I was with him the whole time. This is absurd.”

He couldn’t believe that Seungyoun would do such a thing. Seungyoun was not that type of man.

“Perhaps he did it while you were putting your clothes back on, son,” his father suggested, Woosek’s cheeks redden upon understanding that his parents had seen the drawing.

Seungyoun looked at Dongwook in disbelief before his eyes narrowed in realisation. 

“You’re real slick, aren’t you?” he asked Dongwook before turning to Wooseok.

“They put it in my pocket, Wooseo-”

“Shut up!” Dongwook demanded. 

“It isn’t even your pocket, is it, boy?” the butler cut in. “Property of A. L. Ryerson.”

Dongwook frowned as he squinted at the embroidement at the inside of the coat. 

Wooseok looked at the coat to see that it was indeed someone elses and then he turned to Seungyoun, not comprehending the truth that was being presented before his eyes.

“That was reported stolen today,” the security informed them.

Seungyoun looked guilty as he ignored the coat. “I just borrowed it,” he insisted to Wooseok. “I was going to return it.”   
“We have an honest thief here, do we?” Dongwook asked in mocked laughter. Seungyoun shook his head as he turned his focus on Wooseok again.

“You know I didn’t do this, Wooseok,” he said desperately. “You know it.”   
Wooseok remained silent as the security began pulling the taller man away.

“Don’t you believe them, Wooseok. You know I didn’t do it!” 

Wooseok couldn’t keep eye contact as he began doubting the other.

“You know I didn’t do it, Wooseok!” 

“Come on, boy,” the security hauled Seungyoun out the door. “That’s a good lad, come on.”

“Wooseok, you know I didn’t do it! You know me!”

Wooseok felt empty as the sound of the other’s voice echoed through the corridor. 

How…

How could Seungyoun do that?

Wooseok had trusted him, gave his whole heart and soul to him, and yet…

Thud!

Wooseok stepped back, ears ringing as his jaws hurt. 

“Care to explain to me, Wooseok, why it was reported to me that my son,” Dongwook snarled at the word. “Was seen sucking faces with a man?”

Wooseok was frozen in fear or disbelief, he wasn’t sure. His right ear was still ringing from his father’s punch.

“Answer me! You…” Dongwook demanded, fist in the air ready to beat his son.

“Sir Dongwook,” a crew man opened their door suddenly.

“Not now,” Dongwook said angrily. “We’re busy.”   
Wooseok expected for them to be left alone after that, but the crewman remained in place.

“Sir, I’ve been told to ask you to please put on your life belts and come up to-”

“I said not now-”

“I’m sorry to inconvenience you, sir, but it’s Captain’s orders,” the crewman insisted, bringing them the life belts they were to put on. “Now, please, dress warmly. It’s quite cold out tonight.”   
“This is ridiculous,” Dongwook muttered, but doing as he was told. 

“You best believe that this is not the end of our conversation, Wooseok,” Dongwook said as he helped his wife put her life belt on.

They were escorted to walk to the main hall where the rest of the upperclassmen gathered, all in their white life belts. They all chatted to one another, drinking their champagne like it was just a normal evening.

“Hey, sonny, what’s doing?” Wooseok could hear Cheeta’s voice over the others. “You got us all dressed up here and now we’re cooling our heels.”

The crewman she was asking apologized before leaving. 

“All these goddamn people,” Dongwook muttered in irritation.

“There’s no need for language, honey,” Wooseok’s mother reminds him, turning to her maids. 

“Go back and turn the heaters on in our rooms. I’d like a cup of tea when I return.”

The maids nodded as they walked away, and Wooseok saw someone he recognised walk past him.

“Mr Andrews,” he called out and the man turned to him with troubled eyes.

“I saw the iceberg and I see it in your eyes,” Wooseok whispered. “Please tell me the truth.”

Mr Andrews looked around carefully, before dragging Wooseok to the corner of the hall.

“The ship will sink,” he admitted.

Wooseok’s eyes grew wide as his and Seungyoun’s suspicions were deemed true.

“You’re certain?” he asked.

“Yes, in an hour or so…” the older man looked around them. “...All this will be at the bottom of the Atlantic.”

“What?” Dongwook butted in behind the smaller man. 

“Please, tell only who you must,” the older man advised them as Wooseok put his hand over his mouth in horror, looking at all the people around them.

“I don’t want to be responsible for a panic and get a boat quickly, don’t wait. You remember what I told you about the boats?”   
Wooseok gulped as he nodded, mind racing as Mr Andrews walked away hastily. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please! Step this way, please. Come towards me!” 

Everyone turned to move out onto the deck where the crewmen had begun preparing the lifeboats. 

“For the time being, I shall require only women and children!”

A flare was lit up, a spark of light brightening the cold evening for a moment. 

“Come on sister, you heard the gentlemen,” Cheetah said, guiding Wooseok’s mother to the lifeboat. 

“Will the lifeboats be seated according to class? I hope they’re not too crowded,” Wooseok’s mother complained, and Wooseok looked at his mother like she was talking a different language. 

“Oh mother, please shut up,” he whispered. How could she be so shallow when she should be grateful that she had a seat in the lifeboats?

“Don’t you understand? The water is freezing and there aren’t enough boats. Not enough by half,” Wooseok explained. “Half the people on this ship are going to die.” Wooseok’s mother looked shockingly at her son. 

“Not the better half,” Dongwook added, making Wooseok glare at him in annoyance.

“Come on, sister, get in the boat,” Cheetah called out again. “First-class seats are right up here.”

“You know, it’s a pity we didn’t keep that drawing,” Dongwook said as they watched Wooseok’s mother sitting beside Cheetah. “It’ll be worth a lot more by morning.”

Wooseok’s mind paused before it reeled at the thought of all the lower class people that were not present by the top deck with them, and he gasped as he realised he had no idea where Seungyoun was. 

“You unimaginable bastard,” he swore against his father, turning to look for Seungyoun.

Wooseok pushed against people as he felt a hand grabbing his arm. 

“Where are you going?” Dongwook asked him aggressively. 

“To him,” Wooseok answered, struggling to push the older man away.

“No,” Dongwook growled, holding him in place.

Wooseok grunted as he tried to get away, and when he realised that he could not outbeat his father in strength, he hawked, tilting his head back before spitting on his father’s face. 

Dongwook’s hold lessened and Wooseok managed to free himself, running quickly, without looking back. 

“Mr Andrews!” he shouts, looking for the man who knew every room of the ship like the back of his hand. “Mr Andrews!”

Thankfully he managed to find him quickly and ran to him in a hurry.

“Mr Andrews, thank God,” he said as he reached him. “Mr Andrews, where would security take someone under arrest?” 

The older man looked at him confusingly. “What? Wooseok, what are you doing here? Wear a life belt, you have to get to a boat right away.”   
“No! I’m doing this with or without your help, sir, but without will take longer.”   
Mr Andrews stared at Wooseok for a second before shaking his head, he then began stating a list of directions and Wooseok worked hard to remember all of them.

Take the elevator to the bottom, the older man had first said. Wooseok rushed to go to the elevator where the operator was stopping people from using it.

“I’m sorry, sir, but the lifts are closed,” he tells Wooseok.

But Wooseok was filled with so much frustration that he pushed the man into the elevator, shouting at him to take him down. The man looked at him frightfully, doing so as he said.

Wooseok frantically waited as the elevator took them down one level at a time.

When they approached the lowest level, a gush of cold water entered the lifts up to their knees.    
The operator yells, pulling the lever to go back up, but Wooseok stopped him and forced himself out. 

Wooseok ran, ignoring the operator's calls for him, as he went through what Mr Andrew told him. Go to the left down the crewman’s passage. Wooseok eyes searched for it as he trudged through the cold waters. The water was reaching mid his thighs as he panted to the corridor where Mr Andrew told him to go, but he still had no idea where the other was.

“Seungyoun?” he called out. “Seungyoun?”

Fear began setting in his mind as the lights flickered around him. 

“Seungyoun! Seungyoun!”

Wooseok was losing hope as he walked past one empty room after the other, but still no sign of the man he was searching for.

“Seungyoun!”

Suddenly, Wooseok heard a faint shout behind him, at the very end of the corridor.

“Wooseok!” 

Wooseok turned upon hearing Seungyoun’s voice, panting as he tried to find where he was.

“Wooseok, I’m here! I’m in here!”

“Seungyoun!” Wooseok called out, heart pounding as he drew closer.

“Wooseok,” the other man shouted in relief as Wooseok opened the door.

“Seungyoun! Seungyoun! I’m so sorry. I’m sorry,” he repeated, trudging to the taller man and connecting their lips through a kiss. 

“That butler put it in my pocket,” Seungyoun insisted, focusing more on what had happened despite being handcuffed to a pipe.

“I know, I know, I know, I know,” Wooseok said as he hugged the taller man. 

“Listen, Wooseok, you’re going to have to find a spare key, alright?” Seungyoun calmly instructs him as Wooseok nodded his head. “Look in that cabinet right there.”

Wooseok tried to go to the said cabinet as fast as he could, feeling overwhelmed by all the keys hanging in it. 

“It’s a little silver one, Wooseok. Silver,” the other man tried to help, but Wooseok only shook his head in frustration. 

“These are all brass ones!” he exclaimed.

“Check over there, Wooseok,” Seungyoun looked by the drawer and the shorter man searched through it too.

“Wooseok…” Seungyoun whispered softly, he turned to find the other looking at him gently. “How did you find out I didn’t do it?”

Wooseok thought back on what happened before he answered.

“I didn’t,” he said. Seungyoun looked at him puzzled.

“I just realised I already knew,” Wooseok answered truthfully, feeling regret for the brief moment he doubted the other.

Seungyoun watched him with tender eyes before his attention fell on the rising waters.

“Keep looking,” he tells Wooseok.

But there was no key to be found and Wooseok was beginning to become frantic. 

“No key,” he shouts out loud. “There’s no key!”

How will they be able to get Seungyoun out of there?

“Alright, Wooseok, listen,” Seungyoun calms him down. “You’re going to have to go find some help.”

“It’ll be alright,” he reassured the shorter man. 

It took Wooseok a second to reign in his hysteria, waddling to the taller man and placing another kiss on his lips. 

“I’ll be right back,” he tells Seungyoun. The other nodded as he looked back at him full of trust. 

Wooseok walked through the cold waters, finding the waters reaching his hips now. He climbed up the stairs to the next level, running through the corridors looking for someone to help them.

“Hello? Is there anybody down here?”

Wooseok turned the other way to find yet another empty hallway, the eerie silence adding the fear in his heart.

“We need help! Hello? Can anybody hear me?   
The lights flickered around him, before they slowly dimmed and Wooseok found himself surrounded by darkness.

Wooseok desperately took a deep breath as panic really started to set in. 

He began hyperventilating when the lights miraculously lit up again and Wooseok sighed in relief. 

His eyes fell on the emergency axe in front of him and gears turned in Wooseok’s mind as he quickly broke it out of its case, running back down to Seungyoun. 

Wooseok paused by the top of the stairs, finding the water torso high.

“Oh, my God,” he whispered softly to himself. What was he getting himself into?

He was frozen in place by fear until the thought of Seungyoun trapped down there made him move.

Wooseok slowly walked down and looked at the corridor, trying to remember which room Seungyoun was in. The lights were somehow still on, though some had sparks flying from it. Wooseok took his coat off, now heavily soaked, and prepared himself as his body submerged on the cold water. 

Wooseok shivered as he made his way to Seungyoun, but he eventually was able to reach the other who was trying to keep himself as dry as possible. 

“Seungyoun!” he shouted, raising the axe above his head. “Will this work?”   
Fear crossed Seungyoun’s eyes briefly before he nodded his head. “I guess we’ll find out.”

Wooseok walked closer to the other, psyching himself for what he had to do.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait,” Seungyoun stopped him. “Try a couple of practice swings over there,” he suggested. 

“Alright,” Wooseok aimed at the closet behind him. The axe went through the wood, making a hole.

“Good,” Seungyoun said. “Now try to hit the same mark again, Wooseok. You can do it.”

Wooseok looked at the hole he had previously made and swung the axe to it. He missed it. He completely missed. Damn.

“Okay, that’s enough practice,” Seungyoun said as calmly as he could behind his back.

But Wooseok was stunned at the possibility of him chopping Seungyoun’s hands off. 

“Come on, Wooseok, you can do it,” Seungyoun called out to him, making the shorter man look at him with scared eyes.

“Listen, Wooseok, I trust you,” Seungyoun said sincerely, and Wooseok could feel how the other truly believed in him.

He gulped as he gripped the axe firmly in his hands. 

“Just hit it really hard and really fast.”

Wooseok looked at Seungyoun’s face and then down to his cuffed hands.

The hands that have drawn such wonderful art. He mustn’t miss this. He can’t or else, Wooseok would never forgive himself.

“Alright, Wooseok,” Seungyoun said as he turned his head away and spread his hands as far apart as possible. 

Wooseok let out a shaky breath as the other man shouted out, “Go!"

Wooseok closed his eyes and swung the axe as hard as he could to the cuffs that kept Seungyoun trapped with the pipes. 

He heard a loud clang and Wooseok held his breath as he waited for the other man's blood curdling screams.

But when he heard laughter instead, Wooseok opened his eyes in relief. Seungyoun laughed as he unbelievingly stared at his freed hands. 

"You did it, Wooseok!" Seungyoun screamed in delight. "You did it!"

He pulled Wooseok in an embrace, kissing the top of his head in gratefulness. 

"Come on." Seungyoun jumped into the water swearing at how cold it was. 

They looked at the corridor where Wooseok had come from. The lights had all turned off towards that area and the water was steadily rising first on that side. 

"This is the way out," Wooseok gasped as he thought about how doomed they were. 

He felt Seungyoun take his hand, pulling him away to the other side of the hallway. 

"We have to find another way out," Seungyoun tells him. "Come on."

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


They managed to get to the next level, keeping their hands entwined as they walked passed the other third class people, who were walking towards the next set of stairs, not knowing what was happening. They reached the main stairs up to the next level only to find many people waiting behind the gate that kept all of them trapped. 

"Seungyoun," they both turned to see Seungyoun's friends. They quickly explained what was happening and all of them tried to find another set of stairs to go up with.

They managed to find a stair that had less people waiting by it.

"Just go back to the main stairwell and everything will be sorted out there."

Seungyoun pushed his way to the front.

"Open the gate!" he demanded.

"Go back down the main stair…" the crewman repeated like a broken record.

"Open the gate right now!"

"Go back down the main stair... Like I told you-" 

Seungyoun sighed as he turned back to look at Wooseok's concerned face.

"God Dammit! Son of a bitch!" Seungyoun exploded, shaking the gate in frustration.

"Stop that!" The crewman tells him.

It looked like Seungyoun had given up but then he turned to a long wooden bench by the gate and called out to them.

"Guys, give me a hand here!"

Wooseok realised what the other was thinking and helped pull the bench off the floor it was stuck on and warned the other's to stand back.

"Put that down! Put that down!" The crew man shouted as Seungyoun and the other men prepared themselves.

"One," he counted out loud.

"Stop that! Put it down!"

"Two…"

The crewman realised that they were not backing down and so he ran away as Seungyoun counted up to three, pushing the bench as hard they could towards the gate.

"Again!" He shouted when the gate didn't open. "Again!"

Third time's a charm as the gate gave way and they were able to climb over it to the main deck.

"Come on Wooseok!" Seungyoun called out as they looked around the place, passengers and crewmen running around in chaos.

"The boats are gone," Wooseok noted.

They all looked frustratingly for a lifeboat when Wooseok saw one of his father's friends. 

"Colonel," Wooseok called out. "Are there any boats on that side?"

"No, son, but there are a couple of boats all the way forward," he answered, pointing towards the area.

They ran to where the colonel had told them and found the crewman separating the mother's and children's from their father's.

"Give her to me," one of the crewmen took a girl off her father's hold and placed her quickly into the boat with her mother and sisters. 

"Daddy," the little girl shouted out.

"It'll be fine, darling. Don't you worry," her father assured her. "It's good-bye for a little while. Only for a little while."

Wooseok's heart broke as he watched the filled boat lower down.

"There'll be another boat for the daddies," the man lied.

"This boat's for the mummies and the children. You hold Mummy's hand and be a good little girl." 

"I'm not going without you-" the girl cried, trying to move towards him and shaking the boat. 

"No, you have to stay still, my girl, stay!" He shouted, letting a single tear escape his eyes as the girl sobbed but remained in the lowering boat. 

After that Wooseok turned to see his own father, looking back at him in relief. 

"Wooseok, my boy, there is a boat on the other side waiting for us, come on."

Wooseok looked frantically for Seungyoun, grabbing his hand as he was pulled by his father. 

"I thought it was only for women and children," Wooseok said, looking at his father in question.

"I struck a deal with the crewmen for the two of us, now hurry!"

Wooseok dug his heels on the floor. "No."

"What are you talking about, Wooseok? We need to be quick or the boat will leave without us."

Sounds of panic came left, right and centre but Wooseok could care less of them. 

"Get on the boat, Wooseok," Seungyoun whispered to his ear. 

Wooseok turned to look at the taller man as he shook his head.

"I'm not going without you," he tells Seungyoun, knowing full well in his heart that he could never abandon the other. 

"No, you have to go now," Seungyoun insisted, pushing the smaller man to the boat his father was waiting for him at. 

"No, Seungyoun," Wooseok held on tight to the other. 

"Go on, I'll get the next one," Seungyoun tried to reason with him. 

"No, not without you," he said every word through gritted teeth.

Seungyoun sighed as he gently detached himself from the smaller man's fingers. 

"I'll be alright," he caressed Wooseok's hair. "Listen, I'll be fine. I'm a survivor, all right? Don't worry about me."

"Only one more for this boat!" The crewman shouted, looking at Dongwook and Wooseok.

"Now go on, get on," Seungyoun tried again. 

"I'll arrange something for him, Wooseok," Dongwook interjected. Wooseok looked at his father in distress. 

"Seungyoun and I can get off safely," the older man promised. "Both of us."

Wooseok didn't know if he could trust his father but Seungyoun quickly jumped and rode on the other's words. 

"See? Got my own boat to catch," he tells Wooseok with a forced smile. 

"Step aboard, sir," one of the crew men pushed him to the boat. 

"Come on, careful," Seungyoun urged him.

"Step aboard, please."

Wooseok bit his lips as he turned to get on the boat, holding firmly onto Seungyoun's hand until he had to let go. 

"Lower away!"

The boat shook as the ropes keeping it up began lowering them down to the water. 

Wooseok kept his eyes on Seungyoun as he was lowered further and further away from the other. He didn't realise when he had started shivering again, but there he was shaking as Seungyoun nodded his head in reassurance. Everything seemed to be in slow motion, he couldn't hear the commotion around him anymore, the only thing that was clear to Wooseok was that he could not bear never being able to see him again. 

Wooseok's eyes watered as he stared at Seungyoun's face. The flares that have been fired into the air illuminated the taller man's face in bright light, casting a faint glow around him like the angel that he was to Wooseok. 

The boat he was in was passing by the lower level of the boat and in a split second decision, Wooseok leaped out to jump onto the railing of the ship.

"Wooseok!" he could hear Seungyoun shouting at him from above. "Wooseok, what are you doing?"

Wooseok struggled to hold onto the railing, but thankfully other passengers helped pull him over to safety. Wooseok clambered to his feet as he ran to find the man he loved.

Wooseok pushed past people, panting and sobbing as he finally saw the other running towards him.

Seungyoun shouted out his name again, running to hold the shorter man tightly against him, kissing his hair, his head, his cheeks.

"You're so stupid," he yelled in frustration before kissing him on the lips. "Why'd you do that?"

Wooseok didn't care about what the other was saying as Seungyoun kissed him more fervently again, and again, and again before he continued his lecture.

"You're so stupid, Wooseok. Why did you do that?" He asked hopelessly. "Why?"

Wooseok smiled bittersweetly at Seungyoun as he caressed his cheek.

"You jump, I jump, right?" He reminded him and Seungyoun stared at him in awe. 

"Right," the taller man agreed as he pulled Wooseok into another tight embrace.

"Oh, God, I couldn't go," Wooseok tells him. "I couldn't go, Seungyoun."

"It's all right. We'll think of something else," Seungyoun reassured him. Wooseok laughed as he realised what he had done. 

"At least now I'm with you," he rejoiced. 

Seungyoun nodded as he kissed Wooseok's forehead. 

"We'll think of something."

Wooseok savored the warmth of the others body, never wanting to part from the embrace when the sound of a gunshot echoed through the room. 

“Watch out!” 

Seungyoun pushed him away as the mantlepiece beside them exploded from the shot and Wooseok screamed as more and more gunshots followed them.

"Wooseok, come on!"

He let Seungyoun guide him down the staircases as he looked back to see his father chasing them with a gun aiming at Seungyoun's head.

"Move, Wooseok!"

Another gunshot and Wooseok screamed as it flew by them closely. They had reached the level where the water was up to and they floundered in the cold water as they tried to get away from Dongwook's aim. 

They managed to run deep into the ship, so deep that Dongwook didn't dare follow them. 

Wooseok didn't know where they were, but as long as he was with Seungyoun, he knew he would be fine.

The water was only on their knee level as they wandered around trying to find another way up. 

A loud groaning sound captured their attention as a door holding out the water gave way. Releasing a fierce wave of water towards them. 

"Go run! Wooseok!" Seungyoun shouted as they tried to avoid the brunt of the water by going through another corridor.

But they weren't fast enough and they were swallowed by the water, the current pulling them downwards.

Thankfully, one of the closed gates kept them from going any further down. Seungyoun kept his hold on Wooseok's waist as they tried to swim against the current to another set of stairs. 

"This way!" He shouted, the water was up to their necks. "Come on, give me your hand."

Seungyoun pushed Wooseok to go up the stairs, only to find out that the gate by that stairs was still locked. 

"Oh God," Wooseok whispered as he looked back down to the rising water behind them. 

"Help!" He called out as Seungyoun shook the gate, grunting as he tried to open it by force. 

Wooseok tried with him, but it was just impossible. 

A crewman then ran past them from the other side and Seungyoun called out to him in desperation.

"Wait, sir, open the gate, please. Please."

"Please, help us," Wooseok begged as well and a slimmer of hope was given to them as the man swore, moving towards them and trying to unlock the gate with shaking hands.

"Please! Come on!"

"Hurry!"

The water began rising to their waist and as the light above them sparked, the crewman jumped in surprise, dropping the keys to the water. 

"I'm sorry," the man said, before turning away from them and up the stairs.

"Wait, please!" Seungyoun begged. 

"Don't leave us, please!" Wooseok pleaded. 

The water was rising to their necks again and Wooseok turned to find the other no longer next to him. 

"Seungyoun?" He asked in terror. "Seungyoun? Seungyou-"

The said man raised up from below, lifting the keys above their heads. 

"I got them," he tells him. "I got them. Which one is it, Wooseok?" He asked. 

"The sharp one! Try the sharp one!"

Seungyoun pressed himself to the gate, trying to unlock it. 

"Oh no," the taller man muttered under his breath. 

"Hurry, Seungyoun!" 

The water was rising past their necks.

"It's stuck!" Seungyoun shouted as Wooseok screamed for his life. 

Wooseok tried to keep his head up, struggling with his shorter legs.

The gate squealed as Seungyoun managed to open it, urging Wooseok to go through first. 

They swam as the water rose higher than even Seungyoun's head and Wooseok kept looking back hoping he didn't lose the other. 

"Go Wooseok!" Seungyoun would always tell him, until they climbed another set of stairs to the next level. 

They ran up as the ship began tilting in an angle. 

"Wait, wait, wait."

Wooseok pulled Seungyoun to a stop when he saw a familiar person standing in the middle of the hall. "Mr. Andrews," he called out.

"Oh, Wooseok," the older man acknowledged him. 

"Won't you even make a try for it?" The younger man asked. 

"I'm sorry that I didn't build you a stronger ship, young Wooseok," he apologised.

"It's going fast," Seungyoun tells him, taking hold of Wooseok's hand. "We have to move." 

"Wait," Mr Andrews said, giving his life belt to the shorter man. 

"Good luck to you, Wooseok," he wished him. 

Wooseok looked at the life belt for a moment before gazing back up to the older man. 

"And to you too."

They managed to get outside, where a disarray of panic and terror roamed over all people who were running around.

"We have to stay on the ship as long as possible!" Seungyoun tells him. "Come on!"

Seungyoun made Wooseok wear the life belt before they head off.

They ran and jumped over rails. Wooseok’s cold bones and frozen fingers slowed him down.

Seungyoun always stayed behind Wooseok, making sure the other was safe first before him.

The angle at which the ship was sinking was almost at a forty-five degree angle and Wooseok didn't know how, but Seungyoun had managed to pull the both of them to the highest tip of the ship, where they both held on tightly for their lives. 

They could see people jumping off the ship, not wanting to be sucked in with it. Some were holding fervently onto a priest who was saying his last prayer. Screams and shouting surrounded them, the sounds of the waves below threatening them too.

They were all going to die. Everyone around him, including the two of them, will go down with the ship and drown. They were going to die.

Wooseok turned his head to the taller man beside him, his brain calming down as he accepted their fate. It focused on something else instead, to a memory where everything began.

"Seungyoun," he said. Said man looked at him and he wished his hands were free to flatten down the wrinkles from the other's worried forehead.

"This is where we first met," Wooseok tells him, teary eyed. And this will be the last place they'll be.

Seungyoun was quiet for a moment before he pulled the other closer, kissing his forehead. Wooseok closed his eyes as he tried to focus on the beating of Seungyoun's heart instead of the chaos around him. 

The ship was tilting even more higher, and people began sliding down the deck, screaming in terror. 

"Hold on real tight," Seungyoun tells him, as he made Wooseok grab the railing with both hands. 

All the lights on the ship then flicked off and the darkness over the ship made their fate even more bleaker. 

The ship groaned as the sound of breaking wood travelled across to them. They all screamed as the ship snapped in half, the stern falling back down briefly to the water. It felt like being in a roller coaster, a ride that will lead them to their demise. There was a calm for a moment when everything began falling apart again.

The ship wasn't completely separated in half and as the back part of the ship sunk, it also pulled the other half down. 

The stern began raising in an angle again, much higher and much faster than how it was just a few moments ago. 

"We have to move!" Seungyoun shouted, climbing over the railing. 

"Give me your hand, I'll pull you over," he shouts to Wooseok, echoing the exact same words he had said to the other just three days ago. 

"Come on, give me your hand!" 

Wooseok grunted as he took hold of the other's hand just as he did a few days ago and like then, Seungyoun pulled him up to safety. 

"I've got you," Seungyoun assured him, making sure that Wooseok was able to climb over the railing next to him. "I won't let go."

The ship was still tilting and it felt their whole world was going to go upside down.

"What's happening, Seungyoun?" Wooseok asked in disbelief. 

"I don't know! I don't know!" The other man answered helplessly. 

"Hold on," Seungyoun warned him again as the ship tilted to a full right angle, and they watched so many people's grip failing them, sliding down to the water and to their death.

The ship began sinking every more quicker then.

"This is it!" He yells, keeping a firm grip around Wooseoks.

"Oh God. Oh God." Wooseok repeated as he felt them sinking lower and lower to the water. 

"Oh God! Oh God! Oh!"

"The ship is going to suck us down," Seungyoun explained. "Take a deep breath when I say."

Wooseok nodded as he put all his trust on the other.

"Kick for the surface and keep kicking," Seungyoun advised him. 

"Do not let go of my hand."

Wooseok nodded again, knowing deep in his heart that he would never allow anything to part them again. Not even death. 

"We're going to make it, Wooseok. Trust me,"

Wooseok looked at Seungyoun's determined face as he nodded his head again. "I trust you."

A few moments passed by before Seungyoun prepared the both of them. "Ready?" 

Wooseok could feel the sprays of water hitting his face. 

"Ready?" Seungyoun said again, before screaming, "Now!"

Wooseok took a deep breath as he was told when they made contact with the water. 

Seungyoun was right. 

The water was freezing. 

Wooseok now no longer had to imagine what it would have felt like if he followed out his plans a few days ago.

Wooseok could feel Seungyoun holding him as they were submerged under the cold ocean. The current pulled and pushed them and Wooseok was unable to work his numb fingers as he lost contact with the other. 

He could feel his life belt forcing him up to the surface, but Wooseok thrashed as he tried to reach for his lover.

Oxygen entered his lungs as he surfaced, sputtering and coughing as his body tried to expel some of the water he must've swallowed.

"Seungyoun!" He called out, looking around. 

"Seungyoun!"

There were bodies up on bodies of desperate people that were floating around him, and yet Wooseok felt so alone around them. 

"Seungyoun!"

Wooseok swam as he searched for the other, voice going hoarse as he shouted as loud as he could.

Suddenly, someone grabbed him and pushed him down as they tried to stay afloat. 

All of the air in Wooseok's lungs were forced out of him as he was resubmerged into the water. His life belt forced him back up and he gulped all air he could get, screaming for Seungyoun. But the person was still grasping him, pushing him down again in panic. 

Luckily, Seungyoun had found him and was able to punch the other person off of the smaller man. 

"Seungyoun!" Wooseok cried out in happiness. 

"Swim, Wooseok. I need you to swim!" 

Wooseok tried kicking his numb legs around as Seungyoun kept hold of him, trying to swim with one arm. 

"It's so cold," Wooseok complained as he began losing sensation from his fingers. 

"Swim, Wooseok," Seungyoun repeated and so the smaller man continued. 

"Come on... here," Seungyoun seemed to have wanted to swim somewhere specific. "Keep swimming. Come on."

"Here, get on it. Get on top."

Wooseok wasn't sure what it was, but felt wood on his grasp as Seungyoun pushed him on top of the floating object. 

"Come on, Wooseok."

When he finally managed to be above the water, Seungyoun began climbing over the wood with him, only to cause it to almost over turn. 

Wooseok screamed as he almost slid off it, but Seungyoun pushed him back on top again. 

"Stay on it. Stay on, Wooseok."

"Seungyoun," he called out to the other weakly, tired from all their efforts. 

Seungyoun paused for a moment, carefully thinking about their situation. Wooseok felt hopeless as the other man nodded to himself before he moved slowly closer to Wooseok's face. 

"You'll be all right now," Seungyoun reassured him, panting out warm puffs of air. "You'll be all right now."

Wooseok grabbed Seungyoun's hand into his, blowing warm air on it in his own attempt to keep the other warm. 

Seungyoun smiled at him sweetly, caressing his hair with his other hand as he panted for air.

They then both heard the blow of a whistle as a crewman called for the lifeboats to return. 

They both shivered as they listened to him shout.

“Return the boats!” the crewman shouted as he blew his whistle. 

"The boats are coming back for us, Wooseok," Seungyoun comforted him. "Hold on just a little bit longer." 

"Return the boats!" 

"They... had to row away for the suction," Seungyoun explained as he licked his blue lips. "...but now they'll be coming back."

Screams for help echoed all around them but all Wooseok could focus on was the man in front of him. 

Slowly, though, as minutes went by, less and less cries for help could be heard. Wooseok found it difficult to keep his eyes open as Seungyoun looked around them, shivering.

"It's getting quiet," Wooseok commented. 

"It's just going to take them... a couple of minutes to get the boats organized," Seungyoun said as calmly as he could. Wooseok tried to ignore it but he noticed how the other's teeth were chattering and of how he couldn't finish a full sentence without pausing to shiver. 

"I don't know about you but... I intend to... w-write a strongly worded letter... to the White Star Line about a-all this," Seungyoun tried to joke. 

Wooseok looked at the other wholeheartedly. 

"I love you, Seungyoun," he confessed. 

It took a second for the other to react and when he did, the fire in his eyes burned brighter.

"Don't you do that," he tells Wooseok. "Don't you say your good-byes. Not yet. Do you understand me?"

"I'm so cold," Wooseok shivered. 

"Listen, Wooseok..." Seungyoun looked at him with so much passion.

"You're going to get out of here," he said with confidence. 

"You're going t-to go on... and y-you're going to have lots of children...and you're going to w-watch them grow."

Tears began welling up in Wooseok's eyes as Seungyoun looked at him with fierce determination. 

"You're going to die an old... an old man, warm in his bed…"

Wooseok sobbed as he watched Seungyoun shake. 

"Not here. Not this night. N-not like this. Do you understand me?"

"I can't feel my body," Wooseok tells him. 

Seungyoun shook his head as he stared at the other with all of his being.

"Winning that ticket, W-wooseok, was the best thing that ever happened t-to me. It brought me to you…"

Seungyoun flashed him his smile, still looking so beautiful to Wooseok despite the paleness in the other's face, despite the water on his hair freezing into ice. 

"...and I'm t-thankful for that, Wooseok. I'm thankful."

Wooseok felt the tears escaping his eyes. 

"You must- You must-" Seungyoun moved his hand to hold onto Wooseok's hand as firmly as he could. 

"You must do me this honor- You must p-promise me that you'll survive…"

Wooseok tried to hold onto Seungyoun too, even though he couldn't really feel his hands any more. 

"Promise me...that y-you won't... give up…”

“No matter what... happens…" Seungyoun continued brokenly. "No matter h-how hopeless…"

"Promise me now, Wooseok…” Seungyoun said fervently.

“... and never let go of that promise," he asked of the other.

"I promise," Wooseok vowed, looking deep into Seungyoun's eyes. 

"N-never let go," Seungyoun repeated, blue lips kissing Wooseok's hand.

"I will never let go, Seungyoun," he assured him and Seungyoun smiled as they both shivered. 

"I'll never let go."

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Wooseok was humming underneath his breath as he looked up the shining stars above them. He wasn't sure how long they had been waiting for the boats. Seungyoun had begun humming a tune to him as they waited for the both and he managed to hum along with him despite never hearing the tune before. He kept humming even when the other stopped, he knew the other was tired and he didn’t want him to use anymore of his strength. Wooseok hummed softly when he saw a bright light moving around. 

At first, Wooseok thought it was a shooting star and he wondered who's beautiful soul was going to heaven at that moment.

But then, he began hearing the shouts of the men on what appeared to be one of the lifeboats. 

"Is there anyone out there?"

"Can anyone hear me?"

"Is there anyone alive out there?"

"Seungyoun," Wooseok whispered, a small hopeful smile forming on his face as he realised that they were going to be saved. "Seungyoun."

The other man remained quiet and so Wooseok slowly moved his other hand to rub the taller man's arm. 

"Seungyoun." He tried to say louder. "Seungyoun." 

Wooseok looked at the sleeping man beside him, trying his hardest to wake him up. 

"Seungyoun, there's a boat," he tells him. "Seungyoun."

The smile dropped from his face as he called out to the other with a small voice, refusing to acknowledge the chance that the other might never wake up anymore. 

"Seungyoun," Wooseok whispered again, trying to rub the warmth back on the other man's cold hands. 

"There's a boat, Seungyoun."

Wooseok looked over the man's frozen features, trying to imprint every single detail of Seungyoun's face as the man kept shouting out for any survivors.

Wooseok wondered how he could still cry despite the freezing temperature, but he was. And when he was sure he could see the other's face even with his eyes closed, he leaned his head on the other's hand and did just that. 

He was ready.

He didn't care. He didn't want to live anymore. 

Wooseok kept quiet as the light shined over him. 

He squeezed Seungyoun's hand as he waited for his own shooting star to take him to heaven.

He was ready. He was waiting. 

But then Seungyoun's voice screamed at him in his mind. 

" _ You promised that you won't give up, Wooseok." _

_ "You told me that you won't let go." _

_ "Wooseok, you promised!" _

Wooseok opened his eyes. The fire in them ignited as he remembered his promise to Seungyoun. 

"Come back," he tried to call out, but his dried throat could not speak any louder than a whisper. 

He tried harder, voice breaking as the boat began changing directions. 

"Come back. Come back. Come back."

Wooseok bit his lips as he looked at his and Seungyoun's linked hands. 

He didn't want the other to sink. He wanted to give him the proper burial that he deserved.

But the boat was being rowed further away from him and so Wooseok had no other choice.

He grabbed onto Seungyoun's arm and pulled his entwined fingers away. The movement caused Seungyoun's body to detach from the wood, and he began to sink. 

"I'll never let go," Wooseok renewed his promise as he gave Seungyoun's hands one last kiss. "I'll never let go, Seungyoun."

Wooseok sobbed as he watched Seungyoun go, sinking down to the bottomless ocean, like what happened to his mother's ring when he was young. Only this time, it was someone far more valuable than any gold or silver that sunked, it was the love of Wooseok's life. 

Wooseok turned to the lifeless body of the crewman from before, slowly getting off the wood into the freezing cold water. 

He willed his limbs to swim to the man, or more importantly his whistle. 

Wooseok doesn't know how he was able to but he managed to take the whistle from the dead man's fingers, blowing as hard as he could for the boat to notice him.

He blew the whistle a number of times before the boat began turning back to his directions, but Wooseok didn't stop whistling as he fought to keep himself alive.

Finally the light focused on him and Wooseok kept his eyes on it fiercely, fighting with all his might to keep his promise.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It's been eighty-four years since he had last held his hand. Eighty-four years since he made his promise to never let go. 

He had taken in Seungyoun's last name as he reached America. He never reached out or contacted his parents ever again. He didn't marry Sakura, he never married anyone, man or woman in his life.

He worked hard as a penniless man, painting and labouring to keep his stomach fed and to keep a roof over his head. He saved up and managed to get a ticket to France, where he rode the Grande Roue de Paris, and drank cheap beer, and learned how to ride horses like a real cowboy.

He found five adorable boys when he went back to the States, and decided to adopt them and raise them up as if they were his own. He had watched them grow up and marry and have many children.

And then he decided to retire to Chippewa Falls, where he takes his grandchildren ice fishing whenever they visit him on their holidays.

He loved himself for the man that he was and he never conformed into anyone else's expectations. 

Wooseok had kept all of his promises.

And finally, Wooseok laid on his bed, at the ripe age of one hundred and one, getting ready to fulfill his final promise to Seungyoun. 

That night, as Cho Wooseok closed his eyes to go to sleep, a shooting star flew across the sky. Guiding his soul back to heaven. 

Guiding him back to his one true love. 

**Author's Note:**

> TT I cried writing this TT  
> Find me in Twitter @chengyaaan if you want to see the reference photo of the pose Seungyoun drew Wooseok as.


End file.
